MVP – Most Valuable Place
[this is my second story after TEASER. you may look at this as a sequel of my first story]
As the Team Captain of the basketball team, everything is dependent on you. And i hate it. Hindi ko alam bakit mahal na mahal ko and basketball kaya naman ito minsan yung rason kung bakit hindi ako nagtatagal sa mga girlfriend ko. Bakit? Same old reasons.
Wala na daw akong oras sa kanila. Mas mahal ko pa daw yung basketball.
Asar… well, wala naman akong pakialam kung makikipag break sila sakin. There are a lot of girls in the world na nagkakandarapang maging nobya ko.
And btw, I’m Dustin Lizares. 16 years old at St. Peter University. Team Captain ng Black Horses. Sabi nila, playboy daw ako. Well, yeah, inaamin ko yun. Pero i can’t be called na playboy naman talaga.. well, more like .. uhmm, friendly lang talaga when it comes to girls. LOL.
I really don’t want to share this story with you.. pero..well.. uhmm.. since epal ako, sige.. basahin niyo nalang itong private life ko..
The other side of the said ‘walang-kaprobleproblema-guy.
———————————–
“Dustin.. someone went at my office kanina..”
LOL. >0<
Then my sister came in at my room. Cheska. She’s really annoying. She’s 2 years younger than me so iisang school kami.
“Oh, kuya..letter mo o.”
It was raining when I saw this girl standing well, five miles away from the covered court. She’s holding an umbrella. Hindi ko alam kung san siya nakatingin, pero kahit ang layo niya sa kinatatayuan ko, i can see that there’s loneliness in her heart.
Dustin, baduy!
So pinabayaan ko nalang yung incident na yun. That girl wasn’t familiar with me. Baka naman may hinahanap lang yun at naligaw sa school namin.
After ng practice eh nagchill kami sa Karlo’s. Its a billiard hall. Pero clean fun naman yung ginagawa namin. We don’t drink nor smoke, tatanggalin kami sa team pag nalamang umiinom or nagsisigarilyo kami. So that’s it.
I went home and humiga sa kama. Then, nung nakapagpahinga na ng konti, nag-online at binuksan yung friendster. Tiningnan ko yung friendster ng sister ko. Yeah, Cheska. Daming pretty girls dun e. Pero never ako nag-iinvite ha. I just visit their profiles and after a day or two, friends na kami. LOL.
When i was scanning some pics of her friends… I saw this girl… and i was like?
Nung nilingon ko siya….
Wait! Dustin.. bakit mo naman pinoproblemahan yung tungkol sa Ella na yan? She’s not that drop dead gorgeous no..
After nun e lumabas na kaagad si Cheska. Naligo ako at natulog na kaagad. Hinde kasi ako yung tipo ng lalaki na nagpupuyat. Maliban nalang pag may gimik. Yeah. Ayala North Bar. Lol. Daming mgaganda dun.
“Miss, exc-“
“Miss, excuse me. Pero i think bawal gamitin ang court kung hinde ka player.”
“Miss..”
“Woah.. miss..”
Umupo siya sa sahig at pinunasan yung mukha niya.
Lumapit ako para tanungin siya kung bakit siya nandito.
“Miss, hinde ka pwed-“
“Ahh.. ganun ba? Pero.. i think hinde pwede yan e.. Siguro next time nalang.”
Ni hinde man lang lumingon. Pupulutin ko na sana ang bola ng makita ko ang panyo niya.
“Miss..!! MIss!!”hinabol ko siya hanggang sa library na building. Teka, ang layo na ah..
Ng lumingon siya..
“Bakit?”
I was
Teka, she’s the girl i saw last Monday. Ella?
“Ella Rodriguez?”i asked.
Nabigla siya. yeah, sino ba naman ang hinde mabibigla na alam ng isang tao yung pangalan mo though hinde naman kayo close.
And wait. I remembered her name. LOL to that.
“Y-you know me?”
“I’m sorry. Bakit?”
Dun ko lang ulit naisip.. tama… yung hanky pala.
“Here.” i said handing out the hanky.
Mabilis niyang kinuha yung hanky. Dun kona naman nakita yung lungkot sa kanyang mata. Meron bang ganun?
Nung recess time, pumunta kami ng canteen at kumain. I saw Ella sitting at the far edge of the hall.
Habang nakatingin ako dun, somebody tapped at the table. Tiningnan ko yung taong yun.
“Bakit?”tanong ko.
“Pucha ka pare. Pati gf ko inagaw mo.”
“Pare? Di tayo close. Gf mo? Sino?”
“Anong sino?!” woah. galit na siya.
“Sino sa kanila?”
“Dianne Anderson! Dianne.”
“Dianne? Sinong Dianne? Ni hinde ko nga maalalang may gf akong Dianne ang pangalan e.”
“Hintayin mo ako sa labas mamaya.”
“Sure. 5:30 pm. Sa Toks.”
He signed FU to me. Tapos umalis. Away pala ang gusto e. Edi away ibibigay ko sa kanya.
LUmingon ulit ako sa table na kinauupuan ni Ella. Wala na siya dun.
Nang papunta ako sa cr, somebodyasked me.
“Papatol ka dun?”
I looked at her. She’s sitting under the Ilang-ilang tree reading some book with her eyeglasses on.
“Team Captain. As far as i know, malapit na ang finals, and if you’re going to fight with that guy, there’s no doubt na sa kangkongan kayo pupulutin. You wouldn’t risk your names juz because of that damn guy, would you?”she said habang nakatingin parin sa libro.
“I don’t think na pinapagana mo ang utak mo.”she said again.
“Men’s business.”i said at pumasok sa cr.
Paglabas ko, the bell rang. So i hurriedly ran to the court at nagpractice again. Whole day kaming nagpractice, so sobrang nakakapagod talaga. Nung afternoon, natapos na din. Nagpahinga lang ako sandali, nag-usap kami ni coach bout dun sa away at pumunta ako sa men’s shower. Ako yung pinakahuling gumamit ng men’s shower kasi nga ako yugn huling pumunta dun. Uuwi na sana ako ng natandaan ko yung trigonometry notebook ko sa bench dun sa court. Mawala lang lahat, wag lang yun.
Tumakbo ako papunta sa court when i heard someone using the ball. Minumulto ako?
I hurriedly went inside.
“Ella Rodriguez!”
“Hinde yan pwede. At sa pagkakaalam ko, walang PE ang mga 4th year girls sa basketball.”
Kinuha ko ang bola sa kanya.
“I read that awhile ago. Trigo lang nahihirapan ka? You couldn’t even get half the score of your quizzes.” she said.
So? Who cares?
“Okay, i’m not good at trigonometry. And yeah, so what? I know you’re a smart girl. Hinde mo na kelangan ipamukha sakin yan.”i said at tumalikod papunta sa door ng court.
“I’m not good at basketball, you’re not good at trigo. Maybe we can help each other out.”she said.
Napatigil ako sa paglalakad. Help each other?
“Huh?”
“What’s the deal?”i asked.
“Nothin much. You just have to teach me all about b-ball. And please, don’t think na I’m doing this because i like you or anything. You’re not my type.”she said.
Excuse me?!
“So? Is it a deal? Or no deal?”
Muntik na akong matawa dun sa tinanong niya. Pero pinag-isipan ko yugn sinabi niya. Wala namang mawawala kung papayag ako. We’ll both have great benefits naman. Walang lugi. So…why not try it?
“Its a deal.”
“Hinde ka ba sasakay ng chedeng niyo?” she said habang naglalakad. Ni hinde man lang ako nililingon.
“Talaga lang ha.”she stopped para tumawid.
“You’re weird.”Nasabi ko nalang. Yeah, she’s weird naman talaga e.
Nabigla ako when she looked at me horrified. Yung parang nabigla siya na sinabihan ko siya ng ganun. Wait, don’t tell me ako pa lang ang nagsabi sakanya nun?
“I mean…” I hurriedly said. Wala akong idea kung anong isusunod ko.
“Of course I’m weird.”She said. Nabigla na naman ako dun. Kanina lang she looked like she’s going to die with what I said, tapos ngayon..
She’s really weird. Bago pa ako makapagsalita, nandun na kami sa sakayan ng jeep.
“Don’t tell me susundan mo ako hanggang sa bahay?”she asked.
“Of course not. Sino ka naman para sundan ko. Ingat nalang.”I said at tumakbo papunta sa kabilang sakayan.
Sumakay ako ng jeep at naglakad pauwi. Nang papasok ako sa village, tinanong ako ng guard.
“O, Dustin, walang kasamang babae? Himala ah.”
“Bakit, may sinama na ba akong babae dito? Manong, hanggang sa gate lang yung mga yun.”
Tumawa lang si Manong guard at pumasok na kaagad ako. Ang layo pa kaya ng bahay. Wala namang tricycle na pwedeng sakyan dito. At hinding-hinde ako sasakay ng tricycle no. Ano ako, poor? LOL.
Dumiretso ako sa paglalakad ng may nakita akong babae na nakatayo dun sa harap ng isang bahay. Nakatingala sa 2 storied house. Parang napatigil ako. I think alam ko yung mga tindig na yun.
“Teka, si…”
Lumingon siya sakin ng maramdaman sigurong may nakatingin sa kanya.
“Are you following me?”she said.
Excuse me? Ako, susundan siya?
“You know what, for a new comer, you seemed to be everywhere.”i said. And yeah, she’s a new comer sa school kaya hinde ko siya nakita noon.
“Hey, Rodriguez! San ka pupunta?”
“Uuwi sa bahay!”she shouted habang nakatalikod.
“Hoy, dun ang gate palabas o.”i pointed the other way.
She looked at me. Tumakbo ako papunta sa kanya.
“Sino bang nagsabi dun sa labas ang bahay ko?”
“May kamukha ka.” she said again.
“Talaga?”sabi ko naman, kunwari i really believe her.
“I’m not joking.”she said in a small voice again.
“Sino?”i was really interested in knowing it.
She looked at me again.
“Someone i couldn’t forget.”
“Talaga? You’re joking. Etong beauting eto? May kamukha? Tsk, tsk. You’re kidding me. One in a million to e.”
“You want to go in?” she said. Napatigil na naman ako.“House namin.”
Ooops. Nakalimutan kong pauwi din pala ako. And wait..!! kelan pa siya nakatira diyan?
“Okay, what about going to school or returning from school. Bakit di kita napapansin?”
“Dustin to earth? Pano mo ko mapapansin e ang layo ko naman sa mga babaeng napapansin mo.”she said and smiled.
“Hinde naman ganun, what I’m saying is – never mind.”tumalikod nalang ako at tinaas yung kamay ko as a wave.
Pumasok kaagad ako sa gate namin na kaharap lang naman ng bahay nila. Sobrang weird. Sobrang weird ng nangyayari. Sobrang weird talaga. Sobra.
Wednesday morning.
Again, i went to the school. This time, nakita ko na si Ella na pumupunta ng school. Ewan ko nga ba ba’t ganun. Siguro she’s ryt. Hinde ko siya napapansin noon because she’s different naman from the girls im hanging out with. Wait, so i’m saying na napapansin ko na siya ngayon because she’s not like them? Ang gulo.
Honestly, hinde ko siya pinapansin sa school. Bakit? Ayokong pag-usapan kami ng mga tao dun. And thinking of Dustin-Ella headlines? Hinde bagay. I mean, i’m the captain of basketball, the resident playboy of the school. Then her. She’s a geek. Unpopular, hot – not.
“Ms.Nerd.”i said.
She looked at me.
“Hmm, nagpapakasenti na naman sa b-ball. Naisip ko lang, your ‘someone-i-couldn’t-forget’ is a basketball player no?”
She smiled.
“So, when are you going to teach me all about basketball?” she asked instead.
“Sure. Kung walang magagalit.”
“Well, yeah. That’s what i heard. Playboy. Pero, talking with you right now, i can say na ang tatanga ng mga babaeng na inlove sa iyo.”she said sarcastically.
“What’s the P captain? Why Ella?”
“What’s up?”i asked.
I looked at the three of them. I don’t like the look on their face. Pero di na to bago samin actually. Money matters. Palage na namin tong ginagawa sa mga babae. Pero Ella?
“She’s a nerd. She’s a geek. She’s head over heart. So patunayan mong you still can sweep her off her feet.”
My brows crossed. Ella? usually, tinatanggap ko yung mga ganito really fast, pero napapaisip ako ngayon.
I looked at Hans.
“Its a deal.”
It’s a deal. Just like what I said to her. I smiled. It’s a deal. It should always be a deal. Nothin more. Nothin more.
Thursday, 4:00 pm
“Bakit?”tanong niya at tumingin-tingin sa gilid.
“Its her.”I said.
“Sino?”
“Ayun.”Sabi ko.
“Ahhh…. That girl? Sino nga ulet yun?”hinila niya si Lester at tinanong.“Les, sino nga yun? Si Levi?”
“Levi? Nawp. Yung gf niya na may nakakairitang tawa. I think she’s Kyla.”
“Yeah, yeah, sure.”Sabi ko nalang.
Of all people naman o, si Ella pa. What’s with her? She’s not worth it. She’s not even pretty or anything. Buti sana kung sexy siya. Well, she is. Pero not to the point na bootylicious talaga yung dating. She’s not thin. She’s slim.
Nung pauwi na ako sa bahay, nilakad ko nalang yung kanto. Then the rain poured all over the place. Kaya naman tumakbo nalang ako. I can’t afford to get sick. Finals na sa Saturday. Bawal ang magkasakit.
Then I saw the girl with a yellow umbrella. No choice, kelangang kapalan ang mukha at makisilong na.
“Excuse me Mis-“she looked at me.
“You’re wet.”She said. Obviously, I’m wet.
“Obviously. Ba’t nandito ka? Nagpapaulan?”
“I’m not. Kaya nga may payong no? May nakita ka na bang tao na nagpapaulan na may dalang payong?”she asked sarcastically.
“Yeah, yeah. Pasilong naman o.”sabi ko.
Bigla niya na lang nilapit yung payong sakin. I think this’ll be a great time to plan things out. No, hinde pa. I need time. We need to be friends muna.
She smiled to me. Yung ngiti niya na naman. What’s up with her smile? I really hate it.
“You’ll never understand.”She said.
“What’s up with the rain?”I asked.
“Memories of forever.”
“Memories of forever?”
Ang weird talaga nito. Memories of forever? Meron bang ganun?
“Hinde na muna ako magtatanong tungkol dun.”
Nang makarating kami sa bahay, nagpasalamat nalang ako at binuksan kaagad yung gate. Naligo at naupo sa harap ng tv ng kwarto ko. Lumakas naman yung ulan sa labas. Naalala ko tuloy yung sinabi niya. Binuksan ko yung curtain sa balcony ko. Tapos sinilip ko yung kwarto niya. Nabigla ako when I saw her standing at the window. Tinitingnan yung ulan na pumapatak sa daan.
Ang weird. Ano bang meron sa kanya at ganyan siya? I mean, what’s her past? That made me curious about her.
Before I knew it, Saturday na. I went to the school to meet my teammates. Sabay na daw kaming pupunta sa USLS. We just had some little talk again bout the strategies and stuffs. Le’Cole yung nanalo, so we have to face them for the golden trophy. Yeah, we rule! Haha.
“Go Horses!”we shouted before coming in the court. Nandun naman yung mga cheerleaders namin. The students of St. Peter nandun din. I was looking for a familiar face, you know. Ella.
No, not Ella. Dustin, why Ella? Hinde nga e. Nagkamali lang.
Tinawag yung mga captains ng bawat team. So, I hurriedly went in there. Just some rules and regulations. Then I looked at Le’Coles team captain. Yabang.. no, mas mabuting sabihing arrogant and dating. Whatever, tingnan nalang natin kung sino ang malalampaso mamaya.
The others congratulated me. I mean, they should, that’s the responsibility of the team captain, to make sure everyone did their jobs. And to make sure that they’ll win the game. I didn’t say “he” right? Its because sa basketball, teamwork is a must.
I totally forgot! Yung tutor ko sa trigo.
“What about the vict-“
Pero patuloy parin yung pagtakbo ko. Then at last, nakarating din ako sa harap ng bahay nila at bahay namin.
I rang the doorbell. Mga ilang ulit ko pa yung pinush at lumabas din siya – sa wakas.
“Look, i’m really sorry, I’m late. I had a game with the-“
“Ano?!”
“Rents? Somebody here?”
“Manag hilda and Manong Roy.”
“Katulong?”
“Hmm, house ko nalang.”
“Okay. Wait lang, I’m gonna get some of the reference books upstairs.”she said and went upstairs.
I just stood there. Looking at their house. Laki, pero walang tao. Kaya naman pala, yung maid lang nakikita ko jan. Malinis. Everything’s in order.
“Tara.”she said.
I looked at her. Dami niyang books. Ang lalaki pa. Akala mo naman kung sinong genius yung tuturuan niya. LOL.
“Could you give me a hand here?”
I looked at her na parang nahihirapang buhatin yung mga books. Anyways, sino ba ang nagsabing dalhin niya yan lahat?
“That’s yours.”i said jokingly.
She just smiled. bakit ganito tong babaeng to? Ngiti nalang ng ngiti.
Pumasok kami ng bahay. They’re not here. They went to Tagaytay for a picnic. Naiwan ako kasi i got a game to win. So i opened the door with my keys.
I looked at her.
“San mo gusto? Sa kwarto ko? O dun sa balcony?”
“Ladies first.” i said.
I said. So ayun, dumiretso kami sa balcony dun sa likuran ng bahay. Malapit sa pool.
“Ligo lang ako sandali pwede? Ang baho ko e. Kakahiya naman kung ganun.”i said.
“Edi maligo ka. Am i your mom para huminge ka pa ng permiso?”
I looked at the clock near the living room. 5 pm n nga. Pero..
Ngumiti lang siya.
“Hinde na, maglalakad nalang ako.” she said. Ayun na naman yung lungkot sa mata niya.
Ganun nga, she walked at sumakay naman ako ng bike. Nasa gilid niya lang ako habang naglalakad siya.
“Hmm, makikiusisa lang ha?”tanong ko sa kanya.
Tumawa naman siya ng mahina at tumango.
“Mind if you tell me bakit gusto mong matuto ng basketball. I mean, not all girls love basketball, well, maliban nalang kung andun mga bfs nila.”sabi ko.
She smiled.
“You don’t wanna know.”
“Oh… nandito na pala tayo.”sabi niya sakin.
Tama nga pala. Bumaba ako ng bike at kinuha ko sa kanya yung bola. Nag dribble ako sandali then i passed the ball to her. Mahina siya, pero mabilis niya namang nasalo.
“Okay, san ka mahina? Sa shooting or sa dribbling?”i asked her na nakapamewan pa ako.
“I say both.”Muntik na akong matawa dun. Pinigil ko lang.
“Okay, akin na muna.”Kinuha ko ang bola, nagdribble palayo sa ring. Taz tumakbo ako habang nagdidribble then malapit na sa ring, shoot.“That’s what we call lay-up.”
“Okay.”kukunin niya na sana yung bola.
“Wait, magdribble ka nga muna, i want to see kung marunong ka maghandle ng bola.”
Nagdribble naman siya. Maliit siya kaya I’m sure, mahihirapan siyang mag lay up. She stands 5’7 in height. Ako naman, 5’10.
“Good.”Yup, she knows how to handle a ball. Naisip ko nga, may basics na siya dati pa.
She looked at me. Then she smiled. Taz tumawa siya ng mahina. Now what?
“What?”
“Syempre, meron.”
“O ano?”
“Yeah, nararamdaman at nakikita ko.” sabi ko naman.“Bilis, uwi na tayo.”
Hinila ko siya papunta sa bike.
“Sakay na, kung ayaw mo, takbuhin mo nalang bahay niyo.”
She looked at me.
“Sakay na sabi!”
She’s still looking at me.
“Sige.”she said and smiled.
Sumakay siya sa likod ng bike ko. Nagbike kami pauwi sa bahay. Ang lakas-lakas na ng ulan. Binaba ko siya sa harap ng bahay nila. Mabilis naman siyang pumasok. Nagbabye lang siya at sinirado ang pintuan sa bahay nila. Ako naman, mabilis ko ding kinuha ang susi sa gate at pumasok. Dumiretso ako sa cr at naligo. Prevention is better than cure! yeah, i rule!
Madilim-dilim na yun ng makatapos akong maligo. Malakas parin ang ulan sa labas. Dun ko lang naalala na hinde nga pala dito matutulog sina Mommy. Overnight stay sila sa tagaytay. Pano na to? Hinde ako nakabili ng pagkain ko. Hinde rin naman ako marunong magluto. Day-off din yung katulong namin.
Tumingin ako sa labas ng bintana para malaman kung malakas parin ang ulan. Hinde ako nagkamali. Natanaw ko ang bahay nina Ella.
Hmmm… May naiisip ako… LOL.
“Ella!! Ella!! Pakibukas naman ako…!!”
Pumasok kami sa bahay nila. Honestly, nahihiya talaga ako. Hinde ko alam kung pano ko sasabihin.
“Anong nangyari? May nangyari ba?”tanong niya. Akala mo naman kung anong nangyari sakin.
“Kasi.. ano.. uhmm.. Ella.. hmm…”
“Ano?”
“Pwede ba akong kumain dito?” nahihiya talaga ako nun. I’m sure, namumula na yung mukha ko.
Tumawa naman siya.. Naman… sabi na nga ba e.
“Are you sure?”
“Nilagang baka!”nagkatinginan kami.
“Bakit dito ka pa kumain?”tanong niya sakin habang kumakain kami.
Lumabas naman ako ng bahay at tinulungan si Daddy sa mga gamit para ipalabas sa kotse. Nang matapos na, natulog muna sina Mommy sa kwarto nila dahil nakakapagod daw ang byahe. Si Cheska naman, nandito kasama ko. Nangungulit dito habang naglalaro ako ng billiards. Pinapakita sakin yung mga snapshots nila sa Tagaytay. Ang ganda daw ng kuha kasi wala ako.
“Hay, kuya o. One big happy family talaga kami. And the fact na walang panget sa picture.. hayy.. pwede na kaming model ng bear brand.”
Tiningnan ko lang siya. Tsk. Tsk. This is what you get pag may kapatid kang ilusyonada.
“Smile Kuya.” she said to me habang hinharap yung digi sakin.
Pinabayaan ko lang siya at patuloy akong naglaro ng billiards. nabigla ako ng biglang tumahimik.
“Kuya, san mo to nakuha?…..may picture mo pa…who’s the girl?”
“Hinde nga ikaw. Muntik na ako dun ah. Kala ko talaga ikaw. The girl’s Ate Ella?”
“Woah… don’t tell me you’re courting her?”
“Eto ba?”
Umiyak lang siya ng umiyak habang kinukuha yung necklace sa kamay ko. Ayokong nakakakita ng babaeng umiiyak. Ayoko talaga. It reminds me of someone.
Ella’s POV
Bigla nalang tumulo ang mga luha sa mata ko. Naramdaman kong nanghina yung mga tuhod ko. Napaupo ako sa court at napaiyak.
“Hinde ko na yun makikita..”
“Eto ba?”
Napatingala ako sa taong yun. Nakita ko ang necklace na hinahawakan niya. Nabigla ako kung pano naabot yun sakanya..
“H-how.. did. . you…”
“Nahulog ata sa bahay.”
Tiningnan ko si Dustin na hwak-hawak ang necklace. Kinuha ko naman ito sa kanya.. Napaiyak nalang ako ng napaiyak. He reminds me of someone.
“Salamat. Maraming salamat.”
Bago ko pa namalayan, napayakap nalang ako sa kanya.
For a moment at least, i felt Xander’s embrace.
“Xander..”she whispered.
Dun ko nasabi sa sarili ko, i think alam ko na kung sino ang lalaking kinokumpara niya sakin.
“Ella..”i said habang kinukuha ang kamay niya.
“I’m sorry..” she whispered habang pinupunasan ang luha niya.
I handed out my handkerchief. She looked at it.
“Okay, i know what you feel. Siguro next time nalang.”
We stopped at the front of their house. Pumasok siya sa kanilang bahay, then i crossed the street papunta sa house namin.
“Hanky mo!?”she shouted.
“You can keep it.!!”i said at tinaas ko nalang yung kamay ko as a sign of wave.
I went into my room at nahiga. Xander pala ha. We do look alike. Pero, i can say na iba talaga ako sa lalaking yun. Can’t be. For the first time in my life, may babaeng kumompara sakin sa isang lalaki. Ang pangit pala ng feeling.
It was late at night and kakatapos ko lang maligo. I was going to sleep when i decided to walk out the room at magpahangin muna sa balcony ng room ko.
“Catch a falling star and put it in your pocket, save it for the rainy day…”
I heard a voice singing that song. Then tumingin ako sa window niya. There she is, nakasandal sa railings ng window niya and singing that song while looking at the sky.
“Ella!”i shouted.
Yeah, nakakabulabog ng kapitbahay no? Bahala sila diyan. She looked up to me.
She waved and smiled.
“Still sad?!”i asked.
She nodded.
“Jamming tayo!!”i shouted.
“Where?!”
Bumaba naman siya with a hat on her head. Napatwa nga ako e. She looked like a dork. Pero bagay naman. She’s pretty with that.
Hey, did i just give a compliment to her?
“Anong jamming?”she asked smiling.
“Upo ka dito.”
Umupo naman siya sa gilid ko.
“Eto yung tinatawag na jamming.”
I strummed my guitar.
“Oh yeah. Sige Dustin, kanta ka.”
I smiled.
“Sige, When i talk to you.”
“Alam mo?”
Remember me
Feels like forever
Since the days when we were friends
Don’t understand
All these changes
I’m still the same
No need to pretend
Do you know
Maybe it just doesn’t matter
I feel like i’m not getting through to you
Where did we go wrong
Its hard to be strong
When i talk.. When I talk to you
There were times
In the beginning
When you were there
When i needed you most
We’d sit and talk
About the future
And laugh about us getting old
Do you know
How it feels
I hope that you know that it matters
Coz when I-
She laughed while wiping her tears.
“I can’t finish it.”she said.
“Okay lang.”i said smiling.
“Kaw naman..”she said.
Wag mo kong kausapin
Parang awa mo na
Wag kang magpapaakit sa akin
Ayoko lang masaktan ka
Malakas ako mambola
Hindi ako santo
Ako’y magbabago
Kahit mahirap
Kakayanin ko
Dahil para sa’yo
Handa kong magpakatino
Laging isipin
Lahat ay gagawin
Basta para sa’yo
At hindi naman ako
Yung tipong nagseseryoso
At kahit
Sulit sana sa’yo ang kasalanan
Lolokohin lang kita
Kaya’t kung pwede wag nlang dahil
Ayoko ngang masaktan ka
Wag kang maniniwala
Hindi ako santo
Pero para sa’yo
Ako’y magbabago
Kahit mahirap
Kakayanin ko
Dahil para sa’yo
Handa kong magpakatino
Laging isipin
Lahat ay gagawin
Basta para sa’yo
Bakit nakikinig ka pa
Matatapos na ang kanta
Pinapatakas na kita
Mula nung unang stanza
Hinde ka ba natatakot
Baka ikawa ay masangkot
Sa mga kasalanan ko
Pero para sa’yo
Ako’y magbabago
Kahit mahirap
Kakayanin ko
Dahil para sa’yo
Handa kong magpakatino
Laging isipin
Lahat ay gagawin
Basta para sa’yo
Ako’y magbabago
Kahit mahirap
Kakayanin ko
Dahil para sa’yo
Handa kong magpakatino
Laging isipin
Lahat ay gagawin
Basta para sa’yo…”
“X-Xander?”
“One question. Pag nagkaroon ka ng amnesia, makakalimutan mo ba yung taong mahal mo?”
Napatingin ako sa kanya at napaisip. Ngumiti siya.
“Xander’s my ex..”
Magrereact na sana ako..
“No, hinde ko alam kung ano yung status namin noon.”
I looked at her.
“He’s a lot like you. Magaling sa basketball, habulin ng mga girls.. ganun..” she smiled.“He courted me and stuffs. Sabi niya he liked me so much and gagawin yung lahat para sakin. And i believed him. I let myself fell in love with him.. until that day, nalaman ko na it was all a deal. I was hurt. From then on, lumayo na ako sa kanya. Pero he told me na he really loved me. It started daw with a deal, pero seryoso daw siya sakin. Pero nagmatigas ako. Hindi ko na muli binuksan yung puso ko sa kanya.” she breathed out and wiped the tears in her eyes.“One night, pumunta siya sa bahay, nagmamakaawa. I closed the door at his front. Then nang umaga, tumawag sakin si Phrixie, she told me that Xander got a car accident. I hurriedly went in the hospital to check up on him. To my relief, he’s alright. Except for the fact that he got an amnesia. When he woke up, hinde niya na ako maalala. Dun ko nasabi sa sarili ko that i have to let go. Then i went back here at Phil, i think i saw him on the mall. Can’t deny na gusto ko parin siya and still hoping na maaalala niya ako.”
I kept quiet. I was evaluating myself. My deal din kami sa kanya. And i’m afraid that there’s a big chance that history may repeat itself. And natatakot ako para saming dalawa. No, para saknya.
“Sad.” sabi ko nalang.
“Nawp. tragic.” she said.
She laughed nman.
She nodded.
“What’s the name of the girl?”
“Eh pano mo malalaman kung magkikita kayo?”
Hinatid ko siya sa labas ng gate nila. Past ten na yun and may pasok pa kami bukas. Hinde ko alam kung bakit, pero nag-aalala talaga ako sa sitwasyon namin, especially sa kanya.
Ngumiti nalang ako sa kanya at naglakad papunta sa bahay. Narinig ko nalang na sumigaw siya.
“Thank you so much Dustin!!”
Lumingon ako at ngumiti. Pumasok na din ako sa bahay at nahiga sa kwarto. Napangiti nalang ako sa sarili ko. Bakit ba ganitong nararamdaman ko?
Monday morning.
Yumuko lang si Ella. What’s up with this ba?
“Siguro nga, liniligawan nga talaga siya, pero d’ya think seryoso yun? maybe they’re just making fun of you. Kaya ako sa iyo, layuan mo na si Dustin!”
Hinde parin siya lumalaban. At i think, may kinalaman to sakin. Kaya pumasok ako sa gitna ng maraming tao.
“Leave her alone.”
Nilayo niya yung mukha niya sa pagkakahawak ko. Alam kong pinipigilan niyang tumulo ang mga luha niya. Tinulungan ko siyang tumayo.
“We’re going to the clinic.” inalalayan ko yung kanang kamay niya, pero inalis niya to sa pagkakahawak ko.
“Just go.. ahead.”
“Ella-“
Umupo naman ako at nanahimik.
“Tell me what happened?”
“Bianca slapped Ella?”
“Wala siyang kalaban-laban kay Bianca. That girl’s a warfreak.”
Tumahimik lang ako habang nilalaro yung pen sa kamay ko.
“There she goes.”tumingin siya sa bintana.
Sinundan ko naman yung tingin niya. Ella was walking down the corridor papunta sa kabilang room. Nagiguilty tuloy ako. Simula palang, bugbog sirado na siya kay Bianca, ano pa ang mangyayari pag tumagal tong pustahan na to? I’m sure, yung mga kaaway ko siya ang babalingan ng attensyon.
Nang recess time, I saw a paper at my locker.
‘5 pm, sa Toks.’
“S-sorry.”
“Ba’t ka ba nakikipag-away dito?”
Naglakad lang ako at pinabayaan siya.
“Ah.. ganun.. She doesn’t. kaya nga pinapauwi ko na.”she said while imitating my voice.
“I’m really sorry bout Bianca.”i said.
“I-its alright.”
“Yeah? You mean nanliligaw kana sa lagay na to?”
“So, ba’t kayo nagbreak ni Bianca? Siya diba yung last gf mo?”
“Ba’t kayo nagbreak?”
“What the hell is happening?!” she shouted at me.
I looked at her in a confused manner.
“Kuya! Wag naman si ate ella! She doesn’t deserve to be hurt kuya! Marami na mang iba diyan, ba’t siya pa?! Kuya.. please.. I’m begging you..”
I looked at her..
Kinaumagahan, i waited for Ella to go out from their house since she’s aware na I’m courting her. For now, that’s it.
“Ella.”i said habang nakangiti sa labas ng bahay nila.
“Hm?”
“Kung okay lang sa iyo.”i hurriedly said.
“Sige..” she smiled.
Naglakad kmi papuntang kanto at sumakay sa jeep. Mabuti nga ito e, at least nasa harap lang siya ng bahay ko.. di tulad ng iba kong gf dati, nasa kabilang lupalop pa ng lungsod yung bahay taz magpapasundo pa..Tsk, Tsk.
“Hmm, Cheska asked me about yesterday..” i said habang nakaupo kami sa jeep.
“Yeh, what about that?”
“Hans!”sabi ko.
“Ohh, may progress na ba?”
Bigla ko nalang sinipa yung basurahan na nandun sa harap ng classroom namin. Napatingin naman sila sakin. Ngumiti lang ako na parang plastic.
“You’re jealous.”bulong naman sakin ng isang tao.
I looked at the person na parang gusto ko siyang sakalin.
“Ysa!!”i shouted.
Ysa smiled.
“How’s my bestfriend?”
“One week ago.”
She’s staying for good? Come on! She’s not, right? I mean.. si bespren dito na?
Hinde ko alam kung pano sasabihin since she knows that I’m after hot girls. Ella smiled and ooked at me.
“No. She’s just a friend.”
“Ella meet Ysa. Ysa, Ella.”i said.
“Ikaw ha, nawala lang ako ng 2 taon, pinalitan mo na kaagad ako.”
“Yup, I’m going to school here. Last week pa ako nagpaenroll.”
Dumating naman sina Hans, John and Lester.
“Teka, teka! Sino yang magandang babaeng nakikita ko?”Biro ni Hans.
“You said it!”
Ewan ko ba’t hinde ako makatingin ng diretso. Ngumiti lang siya at pumasok sa classroom nila.
Things will change this time – since she’s back.
Ysa’s POV
“Oh, you must be the new student?”she asked.
“Yeah..”
I smiled when she passed.
“Hi Bianca. How are you?”
“You mean? Duh.. you’re sooo hopeless!” i blurted out.
“See ya later alligator.”she said.
Dustin’s POV
“Sorry for what?”she said at umupo sa gilid ko.
“About what happened kaninang umaga.”
“You know, I’m serious about courting you.”Bigla nalang lumabas sa bunganga ko.
Tumahimik lang siya at yumuko.
“What kind of guy would you prefer?”I asked.
“Kind? Guy? Well, just the average.”
“Kasi diba pag sobrang taas, pag nahulog ka, masyadong masakit. Sometimes it ends up to death.”
“Sshh..”he placed his fingers on my lips. “I know you’re not ready for this. You don’t have to say anyword for now.”He said while his eyes are fixed on mine.
“Dustin..”
“Talaga? Ako din.”
“Have you ever been in love?”I asked.
“You mean, before now?”He asked.
“You’re reading A Walk to Remember na book?”I asked and laughed loudly.
“H-hinde ah..”he said. Behind the darkness, i could see that he’s blushing.
“Come on, wala namang masama diyan eh. And Im serious. Have you?”
“Kunwari..” I said. Tumahimik naman kami.“Dustin, do you believe in fate?”
“Opo..”
Pumasok ako ng bathroom at naligo. Binuksan ko yung closet at kumuha ng damit. May nahulog namang bracelet.
Tiningnan ko ito ng mabuti. Dinampot ko ito at nilagay sa palad ko.
When did i have this bracelet? At sino nga ulit ang nagbigay nito? I can’t remember. But I stopped using this when..
Tiningnan ko ang bracelet na nasa kamay ko.
..he gave me this.
Dustin’s POV
Basang-basa kami ng ulan. Hinde ko alam kung anong gusto kong gawin. I wanted to hold her hand, pero of course, i respect her naman.
One big wrong move and knock out na ako. I didn’t nalang.
Pumasok siya sa bahay nila at pumasok narin ako. Sabi ni Mommy maligo daw ako at baka sipunin ako. Pumasok ako sa bathroom at naligo. Napansin kong meron pa akong isang bagay na di natanggal.
I looked at it.
I saw Dustin na nakaupo sa kama niya with a guitar on his hands. Basa yung buhok niya and i think, kakatapos niya lang maligo. Hinde ko alam kung bakit, pero feeling ko, hinde ko maalis ang mata ko sa kanya. I felt my heart was pounded fast. And i think, the last time i felt this was when I was with Xander.
“Nakow, alam mo bang yang si Dustin, nahahalata kong may gusto yan sa iyo.”she said.
“Naku Manang, its not a good joke.”sabi ko nalang.
“Hinde ako nagbibiro. Alam mo Ella, naranasan ko na rin yang stage na yan. At sa maniwala ka at sa hinde, marami din ata akong manliligaw..Kaya alam ko sa unang tingin palang kung may gusto sa iyo ang lalaki o hinde.”tumawa nalang ako ng sinabi yun ni Manang.“Mukhang di ka nga talaga naniniwala a.”
“Oo gets ko na.”
“Manang, pag Team Captain ka, sikat ka. Maraming babaeng naghahabol sa iyo. And top that with his physical appearance, kaya naman-“
“Hay Manang, forget about it.”I said at tumayo. Nilagay ko yung plate ko sa lababo.
Umakyat ako sa taas at nahiga sa kama. Wala lang. Nakatingin lang sa ceiling while thinking about the past. Past? Hah. Anong past? Wala lang.
Kinuha ko yung bracelet na nakita ko kani-kanina lang. Nilagay ko sa kabilang kamay ko. Hinde ko alam pero i can sense that this bracelet is important to me. Ewan ko ba.
Maaga pa kong nagising that morning. Paglabas ko ng gate, nakatayo dun si Dustin na parang may sinisipa-sipang kung ano. Ang cute. Nakamessenger bag siya. Taz yung kamay niya eh nasa bulsa niya.
“Hi.”I said habang nakangiti.
“Diba hinahatid ka naman palage?”
“Oo na. Siguro nga sa iyo talaga kasi maganda ka.”sabi niya naman at tiningnan ako.
“Walang ganyanan. Nangangati katawan ko.” sabi ko at pumara ng jeep.
“Ha-ha. Ang baduy.” He said at pumasok sa jeep. Lalabas na sana ako ng pera para sa pamasahe pero inunahan naman ako.
Tumawa nalang siya. Nang makarating sa school, kung dati, hinde siya sumasabay sakin pag pumapasok, ngayon, dinadala niya pa mga gamit ko. Is this for real?
“Hinde ka ba nahihiya?”
Tiningnan ko siya na parang naninibago na naman ako.
“Ayoko lang kasing may mangyari sa iyo.”
Ngumiti kaagad siya at tumakbo.
Dustin’s POV
“You mean, Ella, yang sa kabilang bahay?”
“Getting along? You mean going along?” Cheska answered again.
Sinipa ko na naman yung paa niya sa ilalim ng table.
“You should invite her.”Dagdag niya pa.
Nakakainis na talaga.
“Bahala ka.”
Morning came. Pinaalala sakin ni Mommy that I have to ask Ella. So, hinintay ko siya sa labas ng bahay nila. ewan ko ba, pero parang natatakot at nahihiya ako. What if she’ll say no?
HWaahhh.. ayoko ng ganito.. Di naman ako ganito ah.. bakit parang natatakot ako?
Tumayo ako dun sa harap ng bahay nila. I was practicing what to say to her.
“So, do you like Punta Isla? taz pag nagsabi siya ng yes, would you like to go there sometime?” Huminga ako ng malalim.“What if hinde niya gusto?”
Aerrrggghhh!!!
“Dustin..” she said.
Puting kabayo!
Muntik na akong mapatalon dun ah.
“Yeah, sure.”
“Come again?”
“You want this? Ewww.. this bracelet is just so ancient. I mean, who would ever give this to you? The little boy you met? As told by your ever dearie bestfriend Mia? Uh..! And this one? Who gave this to you? Your lame x boyfriend?”
Bianca was holding two bracelets. Yung isa, palage kong nakikita sa kamay ni Ella. Pero yung isa, hinde ko makita. Nasa gilid kasi ni Bianca. So, hinde talaga clear.
“J-just..-just give it back to me.”
“Bianca…” she cried. Pumunta siya sa tubo at tiningnan ito habang umiiyak. I couldn’t bare to see her like that.
“Ella..”lumapit ako sa kanya. Yung mga tao e dahan-dahan ng umalis ng makita ako nila. Tiningnan ko si Bianca na paalis na sana.
“Alis na Bianca..”sabi ko. Nangingitim na talaga yung paningin ko sa kanya.
“Pero.. pero.. ..”
Lalaban pa sana si Bianca pero tumakbo na kaagad si Ysa. Sa sobrang takbo niya, hinde niya nakitang nandun ako sa daan.
Question mark in my head.
Well, days passed by really fast. Isang araw, ngising nalang ako na Sunday na. My Mom’s busy packing all the things. I mean the food, some extra dresses.. you know.. mga kaartehan ng mga babae.
“Dustin! Dustin!”My mom called me nang makita akong dumaan sa kwarto nila.
Pumunta ako sa bahay nina Ella. I rang the doorbell tapos lumabas naman si Manang.
“Nakow, napakwaguwapo talaga nitong binatilyong ito..”
“So, is it really okay to go with you? I mean, how do I look like?”
If you’ll ask me what she’s wearing, she’s wearing a white floral mini skirt… then nakalight pink siya na blouse. Baby pink to be exact. She looks like a doll. Basta, mesmerizing. Then, nakaslippers din siya. Hinde pala slippers yun, Cheska said its flipflops.LOL.
“Mom, Ella’s here.”
Bumaba naman si Mommy. Dad’s on the kitchen. Hinde ko alam kung anong ginagawa. Nang marinig nila, dali-dali silang tumakbo papunta samin. As if naman na artista si Ella na gustong-gusto nilang mameet.
“oh.. Mrs Lizares? Ugh! Forget about it. Tita will be fine. Or rather, Mommy.”
“Nice meeting din you po..”she said.
“Dustin?”she whispered.
“Didn’t i? I mean, reunion ng family ngayon.”
“Pero..”
“Wala akong cousins. My mom and dad are only children in their own family.”
“Oh, Ella, you kiss your titas..”My mom said.
Tumingin si Ella sakin.
“Go..”I said.
Pumunta naman siya at nagkiss sa mga Titas ko.
“This will be my future daughter-in-law.”My mom said.
Napatigil si Ella. She looked at me again.
“Of course, Mom’s being ridiculous again.” I said.
Tumawa nalang sina Tita. After the kissing and stuffs, pumunta kami dun sa cottage kung nasan yung mga second cousins ko.
“Himala ata at sumama ka ngayon.”Bob said.
“Yeah.. Hehee.. Nga pala, this is Ella. Ella, mga second cousins ko. Bob, Mindy, Gerard, Glen, Bea, Fred, Nina, Hana, Kiss, Josh, Shen, Newee, Alindree, Apple, Carl, John.. yung iba, kalimutan na yan.”TUmawa naman kami.
Then, ayun nga, kumain kami ng lunch.. and.. dami pa naming ginawa.. yung mga bata, nilalaro si Ella. Si Ella naman mukhang bata.. ewan kung anong ginagawa.. umupo-upo dun sa buhangin at gumawa ng mga sand castles. Kasama niya dun si Trish. She’s a 12 year old little girl.. Mejo makulet tsaka maraming alam.
Nang palapit na ako, i heard what she said.
“Believe it or not, you’re the only girl Kuya Dustin brought here.”
“Really?”Ella said in disbelief.
“Well.. yeah.. sort of.”I said.
She just smiled. Umupo kami dun sa beach. Magtatakip-silim na nun so hinde masyadong mainit. Sunset’s very beautiful. Ganda ng view. Si Trish naman, nahalata atang Ella and I will have some tender moments alone, so she left. Sabi niya, mawiwiwi daw siya. So ayun, tinaboy ko naman. LOL.
“Hinde na pala kita pwedeng tigilan.” I said.
“Loko..” she said at hinampas ako.
“My family likes you. Siguro kasi, you’re the first girl na dinala ko dito.”
“Ella.. i don’t know how to say this. Pero I think meron kang dapat malaman.” I said.
Hinde ko alam kung anong ginagawa ko. Pag sinabi ko sa kanya yung tungkol dun sa deal, there’s a big chance that she’ll curse me to death. At ayoko. There’s a big chance na hinde ko na siya madadala dito ulit. There’s a big chance na mawawala siya ng tuluyan sa buhay ko. Ayoko nun.
“What?” she said.
“Ella.. we.. no.. I..”
“W-wala..”
Then I heard Cheska shouted.
“Kuya!!! Uuwwwwwiiiiii naaaa ddddaaaaaaawwwwwww ttttttaaaaaayyyooooooooo!!!”
Nagtinginan kami ni Ella, awkward. Tumawa nalang kaming dalawa.
“Tara..”
I reached out my hand for her habang nakatayo ako. She held it naman at naglakad kami pabalik sa cottages. Hinde ko alam, pero feeling ko ang tagal ng oras. Feeling ko ang tagal naming naglalakad doon. I want to hold her hand pero.. nahihiya ako at baka mapahiya nga ako.
“Oh, Ella, siguro naman sa susunod, makikita ka pa namin dito.”Tita Angie said.
“Tita naman..” sabi ko.
“Eh hello no? Siya lang kaya ang babaeng dinala mo dito, that only means na seryoso ka sa kanya. Hmm, may X factor ka young lady.” Sabi naman ni Tita Hannah.
Ngumiti-ngiti lang si Ella. She’s not the type of girl naman kasi na madaldal. Dinadala niya lahat sa pangiti-ngiti.
Ayun, nagbye kami sa mga Titas and Titos ko. Then yung mga second cousins ko naman e nagbye na rin. Sana daw magkita muli. Pumasok kami sa kotse. Madilim na yun ng umuwi kami. Malapit lang naman. 1 hour pauwi sa bahay and the road’s not that dangerous. Naupo kami sa back seat while si Cheska e nandun sa front kasi matutulog daw siya, so, ini occupy niya yung seat sa likod ng driver’s seat.
“Ang saya ng pamilya mo no?”
“M-my f-family?”
“Yeah, ang alam ko lang kasi they’re in the States.”
“Nah.. that’s alright. No biggy.”
“So, you mean may mga kapatid ka pa?”
“Yeah.”
“Baka pwede mo akong ireto?” I said jokingly.
Hinampas niya nalang ako sa braso at tumawa.
“Baka makasuhan ka lang ng corrupting minor.” she said at tumawa again.
Tumahimik kaming dalawa. Awkward silence.
“So, do you miss them? San ka lumaki? How?”
“Washuu.. ang daming tanong. Well, I kinda miss them pag Christmas. You know how it is.”
“Goodnight Ella.”
Nabigla nalang kaagad ako sa narinig ko.
“Hmpdsfhh… gudnight Xander…”
“Huh? hspshffsds…”
“Dito na tayo..”
“Oh, sorry. Nakatulog ako.”
“Okay lang.”
Bumaba kami para kunin yung mga gamit niya. I helped her naman. Then hinatid ko siya sa bahay nila.
“We’ll see each other again, right?”she asked.
“Of course, Tita.”she smiled.
Pumasok siya sa bahay nila. She waved at me tapos ngumiti.
Ellapotz
Monday morning, I waited for her again at the front of their house. Ginagawa ko na tong daily routine. Nothing special naman, nung recess time, sinabit ko yung bracelet sa labas ng locker niya.
Nakita ko siya sa malayo na kinuha yung bracelet sa locker at ngumiti. May idea ba siya na ako ang nagbigay?
Nakita niya ata akong nakatingin sa kanya kaya mabilis akong tumingin sa iba. LOL. Now that’s funny.
“Pare, ano na?”
“Ilang weeks ka nang nanliligaw sa kanya?”
“Wait, kelan ba birthday niya?”
“Wow Pare, ako ba yung nanliligaw kay Rodriguez? hinde naman a.. Find out.”
“October 24’s her birthday.” narinig kong sagot ni Ysa habang kumakain.
“Really? How did you know?”
“I saw it at an autograph na pinapasignan ni Frea.”
Hinde na ako nakasabay sa kanya pauwi kasi sinamahan ko si Ysa sa isang party. Nung pauwi na ako, umulan naman ng malakas kaya tumakbo nalang ako pauwi. Before I went inside, tumigil ako sa labas ng gate. Then tiningnan ko yung window ni Ella. I saw her na nakatingin sa ulan. Hinde ko alam pero eto na naman yung naramdaman ko nung una ko siyang nakita. Weird feeling.
Pumasok ako sa loob at mabilis na naligo. Wala daw sina Mommy and Daddy, may pinuntahang business trip daw.
Umakyat ako sa kwarto at naligo. Birthday niya na… anong gagawin ka? Honestly, siya yung pinakatagal kong nililigawan..
Tumakbo ako papunta sa kwarto ni Cheska.
“Cheska..” knocks on the door.“Cheska.. sis.. pretty sis.. open the door..”
Binuksan naman ni Cheska yung door niya.
“At ano naman yang pretty sis, pretty sis mo ha? Anong kelangan ‘kuya’?”
“Ella’s birthday next week.. hinde ko alam kung anong gagawin ko o ibibigay sa kanya.. sa tingin mo, anong pwedeng ibigay na gift sa kanya na magugustuhan niya talaga?”
“Wala..I said, who would ever think that you can think something like that? Woah. Anong nakain mo?”
Napatulala ako dun habang inaabsorb ng brain ko yung sinabi ni Cheska..Sinirado ni Cheska yung door niya. Then toink!
Now I got an idea..
I really do..
Sekreto ko na yun…
Ang bilis ng araw noh?
Pumasok ako sa school. Ni hinde ko siya hinintay para sumabay. Then nakita ko siya sa corridor naglalakad.
“Dustin!” she said.
“Hmm? Yeah?”
“Well.. hmm..”
“Cge, see ya later.”I said at tumakbo palayo sa kanya.
I don’t know, pero ngayon lang talaga ako naka feel na i think i need to do something special for a girl. And i think, mamaya na yun. Whew!
Ella’s POV
Well, its my birthday today. And.. sanay na ako na hinde masyadong ginigreet ng mga tao. But this one’s kinda different. Lahat ng tao na dinadaanan ko, nagwewave sakin at nagsesay ng ‘happy birthday Ella’, then they would smile sweetly. Hmm, what’s going on? Si Dustin naman, parang wala lang. Alam niya bang birthday ko?
I mean, he just said ‘see ya later’.. hay.. ewan.. ba’t ba ako umaasa? Ella naman noh.. Nothing special naman ngayong araw – from Dustin.
Ni hinde ko nga siya nakikita masyado e. Well, the class sang a song for me. May gifts. Himala talaga. Then, nung hapon na, dumaan ako sa locker.
May note na nakasabit.
I waited for my mom and dad to call, pero they didn’t e. So, naupo nalang ako sa sofa at naghintay kay Dustin.
Then i heard somebody rang the doorbell. Mabilis naman akong lumabas.
“Manang, una na po ako!” I said.
“Ingat ka.”
Lumabas kaagad ako ng bahay. Then I saw Dustin. He’s smiling.
“Teka, ba’t parang bihis na bihis ka?”I asked.
“Its a special night.”he answered.
“Ang daya, look at me. Teka, bihis din ako.”I said. Babalik na sana ako ng hinawakan niya yung braso ko.
“Nope. Okay na yan. Tara..”he said.
Well, dala niya yung car. Pero of course, may driver. Hinde ata ako sasakay pag si Dustin ang magdadrive. He doesn’t have a license no.
He opened the door for me. Nang dumating kami sa dapat naming puntahan, hinde ko alam kung sang lupalop ng earth na yun. Pero guys, ang lakas ng hangin, parang liliparin ako. Nasa gitna ba kami ni Milenyo? LOL
“Dustin…”i whispered.
Nang lingunin ko siya, wala na siya. Hala! Kinilabutan ako.
“Dustin?.. hinde yan magandang biro..”I said.
Then a man (waiter ata) came up to me.
“This way Ma’am.” he said.
Nung pumasok kami, maraming tao. Alam niyo na, mga kumakain din. Haha. Mga customers. Kala ko kung ano na. Pinaupo niya ako sa table na may reserved sign.
Umupo lang ako dun. Then may dumating na mga flowers. Red and White roses.
“Kanino galing to?”I said.
I couldn’t help but think about you
I wonder why, I wonder every time, I wonder who are you.
Or just another girl that will fall for me dear?
I wonder why, I wonder every time, I wonder who are you
I saw that eyes, that lonely eyes again…
What’s with it? I can’t help but ask
I wonder what; I wonder who hurt you that much….
But then you came into my life, should I really believe in destiny?
I can’t afford to lose you, how will I survive if you’re gone?
Baby to me you’re the destiny, for me you are the one.
Another boquet of roses came in.
I love you girl so deeply, you’re the one that I adore
Tell me how can I ease the pain that you’re feeling inside?
I don’t want to see you cry, let go of the pain you hide.
Fate for me is just one word, a hopeless would believe in
But then you came into my life, should I really believe in destiny?
I can’t afford to lose you, how will I survive if you’re gone?
Baby to me you’re the destiny, for me you are the one
I want to kiss your gentle lips, I want you really bad.
I hope well stay in the moment like this forever, honey
Dustin’s POV
Then I started singing. Bigla naman siyang lumingon. I smiled. Taz binigay na ulit yung mga roses sa kanya. Honestly, for the first time in my life, feeling ko ngayon lang ako nakagawa ng tama para sa isang babae.
Siguro this is when i say ‘i love her’. I really do. From the first time I saw her, alam ko I felt something for her. It was kinda new to me kaya hinde ko masyadong pinansin. Pero as time passed by, isang araw nalaman ko na lang na I really like her. Moreover, love her.
I saw her smiled. Then I saw tears in her eyes. Yung mga tao nakatingin din samin. Yeah, kinda corny, eh lahat naman ata ng in love nagiging corny e. Who would ever think that I can sing? Who would ever think na I’ll change for a girl?
Ngumiti ako. Kinuha ko yung isang boquet ng tulips dun sa gilid. Ngumiti yung mga matatanda sakin na nandun. Siguro naaalala din nila yung teen age days nila when they were in love. I sat at the table.
“For you.”I said smiling.
She wiped her tears and smiled.
“Ang dami ko ng flowers o.” she said.
“I’m sorry kung panget boses ko. Im not a singer.”I said.
“Hell! You got the greatest voice i’ve ever heard! Sira kaba?” she said while laughing.
“Ill take that as a compliment.”I said.
“That was a compliment.” she said.
Tamang-tama dumating na rin yung pagkain.
“Let’s eat? Happy birthday Ella!” I said.
She just smiled. We had a great time. Nagkulitan kami while eating. Then, sinayaw ko siya.
“Would you.. like to dance?” I said.
“Sure..” she said.
So yun nga, we danced. There were no steps that we should follow. The only thing I heard were the beatings of our hearts. (xado ng corny).. pero promise, yun lang talaga. When I think of the deal na ginawa namin, natatakot ako. Alam ko, someday, somehow, lalabas rin yung issue na yan. Hinde ko alam kung anong gagawin ko.Sana pakinggan niya muna yung explanation ko bago mangyari yung ayokong mangyari. Pero I think for now, kelangan i enjoy yung mga oras.. with her.
“I hoped you enjoyed. Sorry, eto lang makayanan ko e.”I said nung pauwi na kami.
“Are you kidding? This is the best birthday i’ve ever had!”
The car pulled up at the front of her house.
“Well, happy birthday again..” I said.
Hinde ko alam kung i have to kiss her at the cheeks or anything. I’m not like this naman noon. Its just that
Well, siguro wala nga talagang kiss. LOL
Papasok na sana ako sa kotse ng..
“Dustin…!”
Lumingon ako…
“No. Its not like that.”
“Oo naman.”
“Ella..” I felt my tears started filling my eyes.“Please don’t say that.”sabi ko habang nakatayo sa harap niya habang nakapikit.
“Dustin?”
“Please don’t say that. Please..”
“Hinde kita maintindihan.. anong nangyayari?”
Bigla ko nalang siyang niyakap. “Wala.. im just – happy.”I said.“Una na ako. Thanks, happy birthday ule.”
Tumalikod ako at dumiretso sa bahay. I wiped my eyes. Natatakot ako sa pwedeng mangyari. Natatakot ako para sa kanya. Natatakot ako.
Ella’s POV
Im here, sa bed ko. Bubuksan ko na yung mga gifts na binigay sakin ng mga tao sa school. Excited na ako.
“Hmm.. kanino kaya nanggaling to? Walang name. Oh well, okay na yan, basta may gift. Heehee.”
I opened the wrapper. Then a wrapper again. Wrapper na naman. Nakakainis na. Wrapper again. Errgghh!
Then sa wakas, ang pinakalast na box. Then nung iopen ko, I saw a very small stuff toy. As in super liit siya. Tiningnan ko naman to. There’s a letter na hinahawakan ng stuff toy.
“I”
Kinuha ko kaagad yung isang gift. In fairness, nilagyan talaga ng number.
I opened the wrapper. Then a wrapper again. Wrapper na naman. Nakakainis na. Wrapper again. Errgghh! Wrapper ulit. Then.. the box. Again, box na naman. I opened the box, box na naman.. Kainis! Sino ba nagbigay nito?!
Again, pinakalast na box, stuff toy na naman. Pero ibang letter yung hinahawakan niya. “L”
“L?” I said to myself.
Kaya ayun, nacurious na ako, minadali ko na yung pag open ng box kahit medjo nakakainis na. Ang lakas na nga ng aircon sa kwarto, pero ayun, pinagpawisan parin ako.
“O” – “V” – “E” – “Y” – “O” – “U”…. I love you?
At sino naman ang nagbigay nito?!
Then may isang box nalang yung naiwan.. Binuksan ko naman ito. Ano kaya yung nandun?
‘faith in fate – Dustin’
Napangiti na naman ako. So, lahat ng ito galing lang pala sa kanya? Ugh! Loko talaga..
Hinawakan ko yung bracelet na nakita ko sa locker.
“Siguro ikaw, bigay rin niya ano?”sabi ko habang nakatingin sa bracelet.
Mukha na kong ewan dito, ngiti ng ngiti.
Captain
nabuksan mo na?
Nagreply naman ako.
Ellapotz
opo, thnks!
Captain
Im sorry.
Ellapotz
sorry 4 wat?
Captain
basta, sorry.
Sinenend ko sa kanya yung teddy bears. Pina line ko sila at kinunan ng pic.
“Same here, I love you.”
“Hm?”
“Mas mahal kita..”Sabi ko at inakbayan siya para ilapit siya sakin.
“Ang corny natin noh.. No, ikaw lang pala.”
“Anong corny ako? Ikaw kaya diyan..”
Bigla nalang kaming napatigil na dalawa. Hinde ko na alam kung anong mga sunod na nangyari. I felt my head tilted. She tilted her head too. And before we knew it, we were kissing under the rain. Its not the kind of kiss like you see in the movies, you know. It was soft and well, hinde ko madescribe ang feeling. All i know is that I felt a twinge of electricity sa katawan ko.
I looked at her and held her face. She smiled.
“That was my first.”she said.
“I thought so too.”I said.
“Loko..” Hinampas niya ako sa braso.
“Hmm, mukhang nasasanay ka na sa pag hampas hampas sa akin a.. Hahaha..”
Tumawa lang siya.
“Naisip ko lang, mahal mo ba talaga ako?”
Napatigil si Ella sa kakatawa.
“Oo naman.. ba’t mo nasabi yan?”
“Kasi..ano.. Xander? Diba you told me he’s a lot like me? Naisip ko lang, hinde kaya you love me kasi nakikita mo siya sakin?”I said seriously habang nakatingin sa kanya.
“Tara na.. uwi na tayo.. baka sipunin ka pa..”She said at hinawakan ako sa kamay.
Ngumiti nalang ako. “Mabuti pa nga.”
Dinaan ko nalang sa mga ngiti yun. Pero sa totoo lang, pakiramdam ko gusto ko siyang sigawan at sabihin sa kanya na kalimutan niya na lang si Xander. Gusto kong ipagsigawan sa mukha niya na nandito naman ako e! Pero hinde pwede, kaya dinaan ko na lang sa ngiti.
Mukha akong tanga no? Parang umaasa sa wala. Kahit kami na, alam ko, sa puso niya, nandun parin si Xander. Kung gugustuhin ko, pwede ko naman siyang iwan at marami pang babaeng naghahabol sakin na mahal na mahal ako. Pero ewan ko ba. Siguro ito na nga yung tinatawag nilang “love”.
Pumasok siya sa loob ng bahay nila. Ngumiti lang ako at pumasok na rin sa bahay namin. Cheska saw me. She just smiled. Yung alam niyo na, yung plastic. Nahihiya nga akong tingnan siya eh. She knows kasi na may deal parin kami kay Ella. So this is what we call “peer pressures” ano?
***
2 months na kami ni Ella, nothing weird are going on pa naman. Wala pang may nakakaalam sa deal thing na yan. Pero minsan, pinaparinggan siya nina Hans. Wala lang naman sa kanya kasi I assured her naman na I love her. Pero kung sakaling ganun nga daw ginagawa ko, hinde niya lang alam kung anong pwede niyang gawin sakin. Prrrr…
“So, sasali ka sa banda?”
“Di noh, di nga maganda boses ko e. They’re inviting me to join as a guitarist.”
“Edi sumali ka..”
“Ayoko nga..”
“Sige na kasi.. ayaw mo nun, perfect ka na.? Captain ng basketball team, nasa banda, gwapo, may gf na katulad ko? O diba?”she said at tumawa.
Napaisip ako.
“Hmm, kasi ano e..”nabigla nalang ako ng tumigil siya at napatingin sa isang direksyon..
Sinundan ko naman yung tingin niya..
“Ella..”
Para akong tanga na nakatingin sa kanilang dalawa. Si Ella, parang hinde makagalaw sa kinatatayuan niya. I saw tears in her eyes. Bakit ganun? Feeling ko ang raming tutubi sa tiyan ko. Pakiramdam ko, ang raming angels sa ulo ko.
“Xander..”
Bigla nalang siyang tumakbo at niyakap si Xander. Aray ko… pakiramdam ko, sinaksak ng isang daang beses yung puso ko. Ay, hinde, mahigit pa sa isang daan. Huminga nalang ako ng malalim. Sabi ko sa sarili ko, ako ang mahal niya, syempre, may pinagsamahan din naman sila kaya siya ganyan. Namiss niya lang siguro.
Pero hinde e. Hinde ganun. She hugged Xander like she’ll never let go of him. Nakatingin parin ako sa kanila habang pinipigilan yung luha sa mata ko. Pucha! Wag ka ngang umiyak Dustin! Para kang bata na nawawala sa gitna ng mall at nakita mo si Mommy mong may kargang ibang bata.
“H-hinde ko alam kung anong sasabihin ko..”
Eh nagsasalita ka na nga e.
“I’m sorry..” Xander said.
“N-naalala mo na ba ako?”
“Im sorry, Ella. I really am.”
“Xander? Do you remember me?”
“My..my memories came back.. and..”
“Oh my gosh!”Ella said while tears started to flow in her eyes.
Nakatingin parin ako sa kanila. Hello po? Buhay pa po ako no? Yoohooo??! I decided to go away – alone. Siguro they both need time – to talk, to clear things out … and to fall in love again?!
Ngumiti ako. Klaseng buhay to o. Minsan ka na nga lang maiinlab, 50-50 pa yung pakiramdam niya sa iyo. B’at pa kasi bumalik yang lalaking yan?! Kung san okay na yung kalahati, dun pa bumalik?! Putik talaga..
Umuwi ako ng mag-isa at nagmukmok sa kwarto. Ni hinde man lang siya tumawag or nagtext kung nasan na ako o bakit ko siya iniwan dun or bakit.. haayy… siguro, kung si Xander kasama niya, hinde niya na ako maaalala.
Kinagabihan, I saw them walking at the street. Sumilip ako dun sa curtain ng bintana ko. She was smiling while looking at Xander. Si Xander naman nakangiti din. Natatakot tuloy ako. Then I saw her na tumingin sa window ko. Bigla ko naman sinirado yung curtain ko at bumalik sa kama.
Nakakainis.. wait? Nagseselos ba ako? oh yesh! Sino ba naman ang hinde magseselos pag yung ex ng mahal mo umaaligid-aligid sa kanya? Bwishet!
Kinaumagahan, pumasok ako sa school. Ni hinde ko muna siya sinundo sa bahay nila. Sumabay nalang ako kay Cheska sa kotse.
Flag Ceremony. I saw her sa linya nila. Medyo matangkad siya so magkalapit lang kami. I was looking at her when she looked at me. Ewan ko ba, pero binawi ko yung pagkakatitig ko sakanya at tumingin sa ibang direksiyon. Ewan ko ba ba’t ganito ako.
“Dustin..”she said while paakyat kami ng room.
“Hm?” I asked habang naglalakad paakyat.
“Well.. wala lang..” I said.
“Ano.. kasi.. i thought you needed some time to talk with him – alone.”
“Alone?! Ano ka ba?!”
“Hey.. ginawa ko lang naman yung akala kong tama.”
“Pero sa tingin mo tama ba yung iwan mo ako dun?”
“Siguro naman hinde ka na bata na kelangan pang samahan kahit san magpunta?”
“That’s not the point here!”
“Eh ano punto mo? Yung topic dito eh bakit kita iniwan diba?”
“Oo!”
“Ganun rin naman e, kung hinde kita iniwan, you’ll ask me parin na iwan muna kayo! Diba?!”
“Dustin..” she said habang umiiling.“Wag ka ngang mgpakitid ng ulo!”
“Hinde ko na alam Ella.. hinde ko na alam..”
Umakyat na kaagad ako. She didn’t even try to catch up with me. Hinde ko alam kung bakit medyo naguguluhan ako. Bumalik lang si Xander feeling ko, ang gulo na naming dalawa. O baka naman ako lang talaga yung nag ooverreact dito?
Umakyat ako sa rooftop at nagpahangin. Kelangan kong mag-isip tungkol sa bagay na to. I really love her. Sa tingin ko hinde ko makakayang mawala siya. Pano nalang pag nalaman niya pa yung deal?
“He came back?”
“Ysa..”
“Did he?”
“Oo..” I said habang pinupunasan yung luha sa mata ko.
“Are you crying?”she asked.
“Hinde ah..”
“Mahal mo ba talaga siya? I mean.. marami pang girls jan na gustong-gusto ka.. na hinde ka sinasaktan..” she said.“Nandito naman ako..” She whispered. Pero narinig ko parin yun.
“Huh?”
“Hm?”
“Ano sinabi mo?”
“Na marami pang girls dyan?”
“Hinde, the last one.”
“Huh? Ahh.. wala.. sabi ko, nandiyan naman si Bianca.”
Alam kong hinde ganun yun e. Pero pinabyaan ko na lang.
“I love her. Sobra. Ngayon ko lang to naramdaman Ysa. Ngayon ko lang to naramdaman yung parang natatakot kang mawala sa iyo yung taong mahal mo. Ngayon ko lang naramdaman yung sakit na siguro nararamdaman din ng mga babaeng niloloko ko noon. Ngayon ko lang naramdaman to Ysa…”I said.
“Ayokong sabihin to, pero Dustin, sumuko ka nalang.. May past sila, present and baka nga future. Wala kang laban kay Xander.”
“Pero.. Ysa.. hinde ganun kadali. Ayokong mawala siya sakin ng wala akong ginagawa para sa kanya.”
“Tell her all about the deal.”
“Tsk. Ano bang koneksiyon ng deal na yan?”
“Dustin, if she finds out about it sa ibang tao, mas masama ang epekto nun. Mas masakit.”
“Tayo lang naman yung nakakaalam diba?”
“Naguguluhan ako Ysa. Naguguluhan ako.”
“Ate Ella!!”
Lumingon ako para malaman kung sino yung tumawag.
“Cheska..”
“Is-is that your new boyfriend?”she asked kasi nga magkasama kami ni Xander.
“N-no..” hinila ko siya. “Excuse us Xander ha?”
“Sure..”he said and smiled.
Hinila ko si Cheska sa gilid.
“Bakit?”
“Do you really love my brother?!”she asked.
“Cheska..”
“You’re hurting him..”she said while crying.“Now i understand.. you just.. you just love him because nakikita mo yung lalaking yan sa kanya? Diba? And now he’s back, you’ll just dump my brother?!”
“Cheska, you don’t understand..”
“Anong hinde ko naiintindihan? Huh? My brother’s miserable..”
“Cheska, let me explain..”
She looked at Xander. Then she looked at me again.“I hate you.”
Bigla nalang siyang tumakbo palabas ng restaurant.
“Cheska!!”
Nahalata kong napalingon yung mga tao sakin. Bumalik ako ng upuan.
“Is something wrong?”
“W-wala..”
“There is.. ryt?”
“Well.. it doesn’t really matter.. let’s eat?”
“Okay..”
Hinatid ako ni Xander pauwi sa bahay. Nung papasok na ako sa bahay, I saw Dustin na lumabas ng bahay nila with a ball on his hands. He looked at us. Then tumakbo palayo.
Xander looked at me na parang ‘do you know him?’
“S-sige, ingat ka nalang..” I smiled at pumasok ako ng bahay. Umalis na rin si Xander.
Nagbihis ako at umalis. Dumiretso ako dun sa basketball court. I saw Dustin na naglalaro. Basang-basa siya ng pawis. Nakita niya akong nakatayo dun sa gilid. He looked at me. I smiled. Pero bigla nalang siyang tumakbo at nagshoot ng bola.
“Dustin..”
“Ano na bang nangyayari satin?”
“…..”
“Dustin.. tell me..”
“Siguro.. dapat mong tanungin sarili mo..”
“Huh?”
“Do you still love him?” he asked.
“Dustin..”
“Siguro, mas mabuti kung sasabihin mo sakin ng mas maaga.. I’m always here.”
Bigla siyang tumayo at tumakbo. Naiwan akong nakatayo dun sa basketball court. Bigla na namang bumagsak ang malakas na ulan. Nahahalata ko, tuwing umiiyak ako, bumabagsak ang ulan. Buti pa ang ulan.. hinde ako tinatalikuran kapag umiiyak ako.
“Pinapapili mo ako.. Dustin…”
Dustin’s POV
Nung pauwi na ako, may nakasabay akong babae. I think her name is Jenny. Kapitbahay ko rin pero di ko masyadong pinapansin. She’s like a nerd kasi e. Pero nang oras na yun, i felt the urge to let this all out.
“Hi Jenny.” I
Halatang nabigla siya at ngumiti ng plastic.
“Hi..”
“Hmm, gabi ka na umuuwi a..”
“Schoolwork.”
“Would you mind if i open up to you a little bit?”
“Huh?”
“What will you feel if may bf ka, tapos bumalik yung ex niya, hinde kayo nagbreak pero parang hinde na kau magkakilala? Ipaglalaban mo ba yung nararamdaman mo para sa bf mo laban sa ex niya?”
“Siguro, yes. I will. In my case, minsan lang ako maiinlove, tapos aagawin pa ng tapos na sakanya? I mean, ako yung gf. Ako yung nag-mamay-ari sa kanya sa mga panahong ito. Kaya his ex doesn’t have the right to get him from me. Except, kung mahal din siya ng bf ko. In that case, maybe i just hve to let go.”
“Kahit mahal na mahal mo yung taong yun?”
“Sabi nga nila diba, ‘it is better to give up rather than to fight knowing that you’re the only one fighting?”
“Pero..”
“Dustin, leave it to fate.”
“Okay..”
Nang pumasok ako, I saw Ysa sitting at the couch.
“Namumula na naman mata mo..”
“Wala to.. bakit?”
“You know what Dustin?! Naiinis na ako sa iyo! Im starting to get irritated with Ella!”
“Ysa..i don’t have time to-“
“You’re the one suffering here! Sasabihin ko sa iyo, she’s dating Xander. And you know what? That Xander is my Xander! If not to her, i could’ve been with him! And now, inaagaw ka na naman niya sakin?!”
“Ysa..”
“If you’re not going to tell her about the deal in no time, I will Dustin! I will.”
“Ysa!”
And Xander, ibig sabihin, the Xander that Ysa knows is the same Xander that Ella loved?
Not until that day. I decided to join the band kasi nga yun yung sabi ni Ella noon. It was December 24th and nandun kami sa school para i introduce yung band. Maraming tao yung pumunta. From the school and mga outsiders din. I tried to look for Ella, pero hinde ko siya makita. Hanggang nagsimula na yung concert. Umuulan na nun ng tumigil yung bandmate ko sa pagkanta. Ang ganda nga ng feeling kasi kahit umuulan, todo suporta parin yung mga tao.
“I just want you people to hear my bandmate’s song for a girl who changed him.”
I don’t have a choice but to sing.
“Well, this song was made by Gerlie, a very close friend of mine. I just want to sing this to you and especially to her.”
Pramiz, Pekzman.
ang buong paligid unti-unting dumidilim.
nandito ako’t inaantay ka.
habang tinutugtog ang dala kong gitara.
ihip ng hangi’y ngayo’y lumalamig
hinahanap ka na din nitong aking bisig.
sa pagdilim ng langit, bitui’y nagkikislapan.
ngumingiti sa atin ang maliwanag na buwan.
CHORUS
nahuhulog, nahuhulog, nahuhulog ako.
puso ko’y tumitibok para sa’yo
tunog ng gitara ko’y alay sa iyo..
pramiz, peksman ako’y iyong iyo…
ang mga nigiti mo’y nakikita ko na
palapit dito, ayan na
wala talagang papantay sa taglay mong ganda
sigurado akong mahal na kita (oo, mahal na kita)
CHORUS
nahuhulog, nahuhulog, nahuhulog ako.
puso ko’y tumitibok para sa’yo
tunog ng gitara ko’y alay sa iyo..
pramiz, peksman ako’y iyong iyo…
ano bang meron sa’yo
na sadyang ibang iba?
meron naman diyang mas maganda pa (oo naman)
kung bakit nahumaling sayo’y
di ko alam.
ito ba’y gayuma o kulam?
ngunit ano pa man ang dahilan..
isa lang ang alam ko sinta
mahal na kita, mahal na kita…
CHORUS
nahuhulog, nahuhulog, nahuhulog ako.
puso ko’y tumitibok para sa’yo
tunog ng gitara ko’y alay sa iyo..
pramiz, peksman ako’y iyong iyo…
“You’re really great.”
“Thanks.”
Sinalubong naman ako nina Ysa.
“Woah, tol, that was galing! Sinong mag-iisip na marunong ka palang kumanta?”
“Galing..”
Umupo ako dun sa bandang likuran at kinongratulate naman nila yung iba kong bandmates.
“Ella did.” I whispered to myself.
“She’s not here..” Ysa said in a very serious voice.
“Ugh.. you look very desperate.”
“I do.”
“Dustin?! (she breathed out hard) You’re..you’re insane! She doesn’t love you! She..she..nakikita niya lang sa iyo si Xander! Bakit hinde mo yun maintindihan?!”
“Ill tell you the truth. He’s the same Xander i fell in love before. No, I liked you – before. Pero naisip ko, kaibigan lang talaga yung tingin mo sakin. And that girl, you know? Yung girl na sinasabi mong binigyan mo ng bracelet. Naisip ko, wala akong panama dun kung magkikita man talaga kayo ulit. You showed me the bracelet before right? And yeah, I was so down kaya hinde ko na pinursue yung dream ko na to be with you. Then Xander Romero came in. My feelings diverted. Siya yung inisip kong magtutupad ng dreams ko to be with you. You got a lot of common – physically. Nung first year, he went to the US. I said to myself, pag pinakawalan ko siya, everything will shatter into pieces. And that meant leaving you and the kada here.”She breathed in.“When I was there, things were going fine. But i was so insecure dahil ang daming girls na nagkakandarapa sa kanya. So we made a deal and that’s to test his sincerity to me. And it was Ella. Ella Rodriguez. If he’s going to make her fall to him, I’ll answer him yes, but if not, Ill dump him.” She wiped the tears in her eyes.“And he did. Ella fell for him. Unfortunately, he fell for her too. That was one of my nightmares. Sa sobrang galit ko, I made a way na malaman ni Ella ang katotohanan since we’re not at the same school.She never saw me before. I won. I did. But Xander came crawling up to her again. Nagmamakaawa na bumalik sa kanya. I was insulted. Then one night, sabi ni Xander sakin, babalik siya ulit kay Ella for the last time. At kung hinde siya patatawarin nito, he’ll commit suicide. I was horrified at the thought. I called her to ask na patawarin na si Xander. Pero she did what? She slammed the door at his very face. Xander went up to me, crying. Hinde ko alam kung anong sumunod na nangyari. I was running at the hospital to see him at the ER. Ella never knew me, but I knew her since then. Xander went back here at the Phil kasi gusto ng parents niya to stay here. I heard Ella went back here too. Then sumunod ako. Only to find out that you fell for her. I hate her.”
Imbes na kainisan ko si Ysa, i hugged her.
“Sshh.. its alright.. i understand..”
“Yes?..ahh..yes.. pauwi na ako.. san ka?…hinde mo ba alam?… bahay? Bakit di ka pinayagang lumabas?.. sge..kei..see ya.. love you..”
“Ella..”
Lakad lang kami ng lakad ni Ysa ng dumaan kami sa isang shop. Its a cake shop. Mejo transparent kasi yung glasswall kaya clear at nakikita yung nasa loob.
Ysa stopped sa labas ng cake shop at tumingin sa loob. I followed her gaze. Nung naramdaman niyang nakatingin din ako.. she looked at me with pity in her eyes.
“Dustin..”
“Tara, uwi na tayo.”
“I love her that Im willing to pretend na hinde ako nasasaktan.”
“Alam kong mahal mo si Ella, pero Dustin, if the feeling’s not mutual, just let go.. let go..”
I forced a smile.“I will, but not now.”
“Something wrong?”
“W-wala..”
“Dustin, you’re good at lying sa ibang tao, pero not to me..”
“Mom, have you ever felt, I mean, noon, kayo ni Dad? Yung kung san akala niyo okay na, taz dun pala lilitaw yung problema?”
“Yeah. Dati, yang Dad mo, palage akong inaaway and everything. Yun pala, may gusto siya sakin. Akala ko, I liked his bestfriend, pero as time went on, hinde niya ako pinapansin and all, dun ko nalaman na i love him. He confessed to me everything na nararamdaman niya. Akala ko magiging okay na ang lahat since we felt the same. Yun pala, nilayasan ako at pumunta ng States. Ni hinde alam ng mga lola mo kung san pumunta.. Then he came back. Simbahan parin tuloy namin. You know, Son, sometimes, when you feel like giving up, you just have to hold on. Fight, kahit sinuko ka na, lumaban ka parin. At least kapag may sinumbat sa iyo, you can just say ‘hey, i fought one of the greatest fights here, sinong sumuko?’.. is it about Ella?”
“Well.. yeah..”
“Why?”
“Mom, she definitely knows that she changed me. And I am willing to continue this change. Its just that, I love her so much and now.. Im getting some doubts that she doesn’t feel the same way to me.”
“You mean..?”
“Her ex came back and.. they’re getting along well..”
“Tsk.Tsk. That’s bad..”She said.
“What?”
“Deal. Hinde naman talaga yun sinasadya. I mean, yeah, sinadya yun.Pero, Ma, the first time I saw her, may naramdaman ako e. Tho it wasn’t ‘love at first sight’. I felt like there’s some connection between the two of us. Hinde ko lang alam kung ano. I used that deal so that I can court her na hinde ako pinagtatawanan ng kada ko.”
“So you mean, the deal motivated you to do the courting and stuffs?”
“Yeah. If you know what I mean.”
“I do.”
“Talk to her. Ask her if its worth the time to continue the relationship. You don’t have to hurt each other. It doesn’t have end up with tears and pain..and..”
“Mom? What if..what if.. she’ll choose her ex?”
“Honestly, matalino ka Dustin e. Nga lang, hinde mo ginagamit yang utak mo. Alam mo kung anong gagawin mo when it comes to that.”
“You gotta try.”
“Yeah. Goodnight.”
Umakyat ako sa kwarto at nahiga sa kama. Then tiningnan ko yung bracelet na nasa kamay ko for 11years.
‘san ka na? ang tagal na kitang hinihintay.. sa sobrang paghihintay ko sa iyo, nakaksakit na ako ng ibang tao..’
Christmas came in. Honestly, hinde ko alam kung nasan si Ella. Pero sabi ni Manang, pumunta daw ng States dahil dun daw siya magcecelebrate ng Christmas. Ni hindi man lang nagpaalam.
After the Christmas, 4th grading na. In few months, ill graduate from highschool.
Back to classes na.Sumabay ako sa kanya papunta ng school.
“Yeah?”
“Naalala mo pa ba yung tanong ko sa iyo?”
“Yeah, what about that?”
“Kelan mo sasagutin?”
Pagpasok ng school, karamihan sa mga studyante nandun na naman sa BB. BB stands for Bulletin Board.
“What’s with them?”
“Are they, looking at me?”
“H-hinde ko alam.”
I looked at Bianca na nasa gilid ng stairs. She was smiling. I held Ella’s hands at umakyat kami. Hinde ko muna siya hahayaang mag-isa. I don’t know what’s in Bianca’s mind. Pero im sure, hinde ko magugustuhan yun.
“Huh? Bakit?”
“B-basta.. please?”
“Sige..”
“Im sorry.”
“Sorry?”
“Basta, sorry. Sorry sa lahat.”
“Dustin?”
“Sorry..”
After a minute or so, I heard people said
Napatayo naman ako.
Then I went out ng room at pumunta sa room nila.
I was shocked to see..
a banner..that says..
I stood there frozen. Hinde ko alam kung anong naramdaman ko. Halo-halo na. May takot, inis, pag-aalala, lahat na. Bigla ko nalang na isip na 3 segundo na pala akong hinde humihinga. Then I heard somebody.
“Youre nothing but a deal. I heard, ganyan din ginawa sa iyo ni Xander noon. Hinde ka ba nahihiya? History repeated itself. Ang panget noh? Oh well, you should be thankful na kahit papano you were branded as the girlfriend of Dustin Lizares and Xander Romero. Pero, ang sakit parin right? They both have a lot of common. I didn’t expect na pati dun e, magkapareha pa pala.”
“Bianca, stop it!”
“Oh, here’s Dustin. Would you mind telling her about the deal? Coz i think, i only know half of it.”
“Tumigil ka na..”
“Ysa? Halika nga dito.”
“Ano nga ba ulit yun? I think, ikaw dapat talaga yung nagsasalita dito eh. She got a lot of repentance to do sa iyo.”
“Right. She got a lot of repentance to do sa akin. And alam mo ba kung ano iyon? First, sinira mo ang pangarap ko to be with Dustin.”
“What?”
“Dustin.. she’s the little girl you’re talking about. Siya yung babaeng binigyan mo ng bracelet. Siya yung sinasabi mong pakakasalan mo balang araw. Diba pinakita mo yung bracelet sakin noon? It was the same bracelet you gave to her. And kelan ko nakita? The day before Bianca threw it at the hole. And you want to know kung sino ang nagplano nun? I did. Ayokong malaman mo na she’s the little girl. Ayokong malaman mo na siya yung babaeng hinihintay mo. And remember mo ba nung sinampal ko si Bianca. I said two reasons. One is, ang sabi ko lang, itapon ang bracelet na binigay mo. She threw both. Two, she’s still desperate sa iyo.”
“Ysa, i thought..”
“Patapusin mo muna ako Dustin! Second, inagaw mo si Xander! Hinde mo ba alam na pumunta ako ng States just to be with him? I was afraid noon to hook up with him kasi baka hinde siya sincere. Kaya we tested his sincerity. At dahil nga, we’re not on the same school, gusto kong malaman kung pwede nga siyang mahulog sa mga babae dun sa school niyo. Kaya we made a deal. Ligawan ka, and if you’ll fall for him at hinde parin siya nahuhulog sa iyo, ill answer him yes. Pero kapag hinde ka nahulog sa kanya at nahulog siya sa iyo, ill answer him no. Pero anong nangyari? You fell for each other. Hinde mo ba nahalata? Ganito din yung nangyari sa room niyo nung nalaman mo diba? Its just that, wala ako para iexplain sa iyo ang lahat. Its because of you, kaya siya nagkaron ng amnesia! Ikaw ang dahilan nun! Ikaw!”Ysa was crying very hard.
Ella’s POV
Tumakbo ako papalayo sa kanya. Nang papaakyat ako, lahat ng tao nakatingin sakin. Kinuha ko ang bag ko at lumabas ng school. Sobrang nasaktan talaga ako sa nangyari. Pakiramdam ko, tinutusok ng kutsilyo yung puso ko. Hinde ko mapigilan ang mga luhang dumadaloy sa mga mata ko.
Inuntog ko yung ulo ko dun sa post habang naghihintay ako ng jeep. Honestly, hinde ko alam kung san ako pupunta.
Umiiyak parin ako habang naglalakad sa ulan. Hinde ko parin matanggap that Dustin courted me because of a deal. Bakit ba ganito nalang lagi? Ako palage yung kawawa kapag naiinlove ako. Ako palagi yung inaapi.
Napaiyak nalang ulit ako at sumakay sa jeep. Nung umuwi ako sa bahay, buti nalang hinde ako nakita ni Manang na mapula ang mata. Uusisain na naman ako nun. Mabilis akong pumasok sa kwarto at umiyak. Umiyak ako ng umiyak. Okay na sana e. Okay na talaga sana e. Pero bakit ganun pa? Kung yung issue dito e nung nakita niya kami sa cakehouse. Wala naman yun e. Wala naman akong ginawang masama e.
**flashback
“alam mong mahal kita.”
“…”
“Ill go back at NY in no time. Ella, would you give me another chance and start again at the States?”
“Xander..”
“Alam ko, you’re with Dustin, but, do you really love him? If not, then just go with me..”
“Xander, Dustin is my boyfriend. I love him. Its just that.. im not really sure about it.”
“Ill give you time.. Can i get ur answer as soon as possible?”
“Yeah..” I said and smiled.
Then he kissed me on the cheeks. Siguro yun yung nakita nila. Pero that was just nothing.
**end
Si Dustin yung batang lalaki noon? Si Dustin yung nagbigay ng bracelet? Naguguluhan ako. Bakit ba ganito ang nangyayari? Bakit ba ganito? No, Ella. Niloko ka nilang dalawa! Niloko ka nila. You’ll never ever trust anybody again – especially guys! Kaya dapat tapusin mo na ang lahat. be strong Ella. be strong!
“Ella, si boyplen mo, nandito sa labas!”
“Sabihin mo hinde pa ako nakakauwi!”
Alam kong narinig yun ni Dustin. Mabuti nga e. Mas ayos na marinig niya. Para at least, alam niyang naiinis talaga ako sa ginawa niya. Tumayo ako at sinilip ko siya sa bintana. Nakita kong kausap niya si Manang. Then tumingin siya sa bintana ko. Bigla ko namang sinirado yung curtain na hinahawakan ko.
Mahal ko nga ba si Dustin? Kung hinde, hindi naman ako iiyak ng ganito no? hinde ko na alam gagawin ko.
“Ella, kain na!” sigaw naman ni Manang.
“Opo.”pumunta muna ako ng sink at nanghilamos. Ayokong makita ni Manang na namumula ang mga mata ko.
Nang bumaba ako, pakiramdam ko, tinutusok parin yung puso ko. Umupo ako sa table at yumuko habang hinihintay si Manang.
“Bakit? Nag-away ba kayo ni tisoy?”
Umiling lang ako kasi nga ayokong umimik. Baka mahalata niya sa boses ko.
“Kunwari ka pa.”
Umiling ulit ako.
“Anong pinag-awayan niyo?”
“He made a deal.” I said in a small voice.
“Pwede pakitagalog lang ineng. Baka dumugo ang aking ilong niyan?”
“Pinaglaruan niya lang ako.”
“Anong klase? At bakit naman?”
“He just made a deal with me. Hinde niya naman talaga ako minahal e. Manang, ang sakit. Ang sakit sakit. Minsan na ngang nangyari sakin yan, tapoz mauulit ulit? Akala..akala ko..magbabago na ang lahat.. akala ko, si Dustin na talaga yung magmamahal sakin.. *hikbi*.. hinde pala.. nagkamali ako.. lahat sila..lahat sila.. manloloko..manloloko..”bigla ko namang naramdaman ang yakap ni Manang.
“Taha na..Ang Diyos ay may plano sa inyong dalawa Ella.”
Tumahimik ako.
“Tama ka, may plano nga ang Diyos. Binuksan niya ang isipan at ang mata ko na lahat ng lalaki ay manloloko.”
“Ella.. wag kang ganyan. Hinde lahat ng tao ay manloloko. Sa tingin ko naman kay Dustin, hinde ka niya niloko. Mahal ka niya Ineng.”
“Sinungaling siya.. sinungaling siya..”sabi ko nalang habang umiiyak.
Dustin’s POV
Maghapon akong nandun sa school. Lahat ng tao kami ang pinag-uusapan. Sina Bianca at Ysa naman ni hindi makatingin sakin. Pero sa sobrang galit ko, kinausap ko silang dalawa.
“Ano, Ysa? Masaya ka na? Masaya na kayong dalawa dahil nalaman niya na? Masaya na ba kayo na malamang galit na galit siya sakin? Ano?! Wala na e.. tapos na e.. wala na..” sabi ko habang pinipigilan yung mga luha na umiipon sa mata ko.
“Dustin. I did for you. For the both of you..”she said habang umiiyak.
“Yeah, you did it for the both of us. And thank you. Thank you ha? Job well done. Great! Five stars for you.” I said in a sarcasm voice.
“Dustin.. your welcome.” Bianca answered.
Sinuntok ko yung pader na nasa gilid ng kinatatayuan namin. Nabigla naman silang dalawa. I stormed out of that place.
Tumakbo ako at kinuha yung bag ko sa school at lumabas. Dumiretso ako sa bahay nina Ella.
“Ella! Ella!! Pwede ba kitang makausap?” sigaw ako ng sigaw dun sa labas ng bahay nila at press ng press ng doorbell.
Lumabas naman si Manang at sumigaw ng“Ella, boyplen mo nandito sa labas!”
Hinihintay ko na sana bumaba lang naman siya at kausapin ako. Pero narinig ko pa yung mga sinagot niya.
“Sabihin mo hinde pa ako nakakauwi!”
Yup, masakit. Sobrang sakit. Pero siguro nga no? Hinde pa ito yung tamang oras para magkausap kami. Pero sana man lang, pakinggan niya yung explanation ko.
And to think of, siya yung batang babae na binigyan ko ng bracelet. Waaaah! Kamalasan! Yan kasi, naniniwala sa quote na “Play while you’re waiting 4 the ryt one”.. but be careful who you play with? Coz baka yun nga yung hinihintay mo? Arrrgghh!
Napatingin ako sa bintana ng kwarto niya. I saw her closed the curtain. Tumalikod ako at dumiretso sa bahay. Wala na namang tao. Pumunta ako sa kitchen. Si Cheska, may pajama party daw sa bahay ng friend niya. Si Mommy, may business trip. Si Dad? Ewan ko dun. Baka uuwi din dito mamaya. Umupo ako dun sa entertainment room at nag-isip. Pinapatahan yung galit na nararamdaman ko sa loob.
Whew..
Then I heard na may kotseng tumigil. That must be Dad. Bumaba ako at nag greet ng ‘good evening’. Then umakyat again at dumiretso sa kwarto. Nag-order nalang siya ng pagkain sa labas at tinawag ako at kumain kami.
“Got any problem?”he asked habang kumakain kami. The silence was deafening.
“Wala po.”I said.
“Hinde ka naman ganyan pag magkasama tayo ah? Si Ella ba?”
Tumahimik ako at tumigil sa pagkain. Feeling ko, may bato sa lalamunan ko na dapat kong iluwal.
“What happened?”
“Alam niya na pinagpustahan namin siya.. and.. well, yeah, masama yun. Pero dad, ginawa ko yung pustahan na yun para maging dahilan ko sa pangliligaw sa kanya na hinde pinagtatawanan ng mga kada ko, na hinde nanginginig yung mga tuhod ko kasi I can say to myself na, ‘remember, pustahan lang yan’.”
“In short, you used it to motivate you in courting her?”
“Yeah.” I said.
“You don’t really wanna hurt her, do you?”
“Of course, I dont want to hurt her.”
“Dustin, remember this, you’ll know tha a girl loves you if she wouldn’t hurt you no matter how much you hurt her. And you’ll know how much you love her, if you don’t hurt her even if you know you can.”
“Dad..”I said.
My Dad tapped my shoulder and smiled. Sometimes si Dad, bolero pag oras ng kagaguhan, pero si Daddy, maaasahan mo talaga yan pag kelangan mo ng kausap.
“Thanks.” I smiled. Lumabas ako ng bahay at umupo dun sa gilid ng pool. Dun talaga yung tambayan ko pag medyo nagiging mahirap ang buhay ko e.
Pero ewan ko ba, tumayo ako at pumunta ng kwarto, kinuha ko ang bola na naroon sa cabinet at pumunta ng basketball court. Hinde naman ganun kadelikado kasi marami-rami pa yung tao na nandun since yung b-ball court e nandun sa park ng village.
Parang hinila nalang ako ng mga paa ko dun. Then I played basketball. Mag-isa lang ako dun sa court na nagdidribble. Mukha na akong lelang pero pakiramdam ko, eto lang yung way na mejo magpapagaan ng pakiramdam ko.
Nang lumingon ako, nakita ko si Ella na nakatayo dun sa dulo ng b-ball court. Bigla nalang akong napatigil. Nakatingin lang kami sa isa’t-isa.
“Ella..”
Kahit malayo ako sa kanya, nakikita ko parin yung galit at suklam sa mga mata niya. Bigla nalang siyang umalis. Mabilis ko naman siyang sinundan.
“Ella, sandali.”Hinawakan ko yung kanang braso niya at niyakap siya.“Pakinggan mo muna ako. please…”
She just stood there like a rock. Binitiwan ko siya at tiningnan niya ako sa mata.
“Ayoko na..”she said.
“Ella, mahal kita.. please, another chance.. another chance..”I said habang nagmamakaawa.
“Dustin, I don’t need guys like you. Sabi mo, Ive changed you. Pero, did i really change you?”
“Ella, you did. Youre.. you’re just afraid to take the risk in continuing changing me.”
“I want an average guy. At yun yung hinde mo magagawa para sakin. Alam mo kung bakit? Kasi nga, you’re not an average guy. Isa ka sa mga taong mahirap abutin. Paglalaruan mo lang yung mga taong nasa ibaba mo. And sad to say, kasali ako sa mga laruan mo.” She said with bitterness in her voice.
“Ella..”
“I don’t need you. I don’t need another man who will break my heart into pieces over and over again. You’re just another liar na dapat kinaiinisan at hinde pinaniniwalaan. I pity the girl na magmamahal sa iyo.”
Clap. Clap. Clap.
“What a nice scene.”sabi ng kung sino mang kumag dun sa likod namin.
Lumingon ako para tingnan kung sino yun. Naalarma ako ng makita ko si Jake na nakatayo dun kasama ang barkada niya. Pinaatras ko si Ella sa likod ko.
“Wag muna dito Jake.”sabi ko habang nakaharap sa kanya.
“Mas okay nga dito e. Sabi mo noon, wag rin muna. Siguro eto na yung tamang panahon diba?”
“May kasama akong babae. respeto lang kahit ngayong gabi lang.”
Bago pa ako makapagsalita, hinablot ng dalawang lalaki sa likuran ko si Ella.
“Bitiwan niyo ako!! Ano ba?! Bitiwan niyo ako!”
“Third, about Dustin. Yeah, he made a deal with his friends about you. He fell in love. He used that deal para wag siyang tawanan ng kada namin at ng ibang tao.” she wiped the tears inher eyes. “You changed him, na kahit ako hinde ko yun nagawa. Honestly, I admire you. You can change a person kahit hinde mo naman sinasadya. But you’re just.. you’re just using my bestfriend! Sabihin natin.. yeah, you fell for him. That was before na hinde nagpakita si Xander ulit. Pero ngayon ano na? Anong ginagawa mo sa kanya? You’re hurting him! Sinasaktan mo siya Ella.. Sinasaktan mo siya.. diba dapat, you’re the one accountable for his change? Diba dapat ikaw yung taong magpapatuloy sa kanya sa pagiging ganyan niya? Pero Ella… you’re so unfair. Dahil ba bumalik si Xander, ganyan na lang? Iiwan mo nalang siya? I just can’t let you do that… I cant afford to see Dustin’s heart shatter into pieces because of you! And nung 24? Anong ginawa mo? Alam mong may concert sina Dustin dito sa school, pero nasan ka? You called him up saying, im in the house.. blah..blah..blah.. pero nasan ka? You were there sa cakehouse.. with who? Xander..” she wiped the tears in her eyes again. “Alam kong Dustin pretended na hinde siya nasasaktan, pero Ella, just looking in his eyes, makikita mo lahat. Makikita mo kung ganno ka niya kamahal. Its just that… bakit mo siya ginaganito?”
Bigla nalang siyang nilapitan ni Bianca at niyakap.. “Shhss… tama na sis..”
“Ella..”
Pak!
“Ella, Im sorry.”
“S-siguro nga..siguro nga I deserve this..Siguro nga ganito talaga yung…yung..nakatakda na mangyari sakin.. siguro nga..siguro nga gaganituhin nalang ako palagi.. minamahal dahil sa deal. Dahi sa lintik na deal na yan! *hikbi* Bakit Dustin? Ganito na ba talaga ako ka undesirable? Wala na bang lalaking magmamahal sakin not because of a deal? Kundi dahil mahal niya talaga ako? Sagutin mo ako Dustin..”
“Ella, please, listen..”
“Just go away..”
“Ella, please!”
The first time I met her, she was shooting a ball at the net.
The first time we talked, dito rin yun.
The first time I played basketball with a girl, sa court din yun.
The first time I said to myself na mahal ko siya, dahil din sa court.
And siguro..
“Dustin.. sabi ko na nga e..”
“I love you.. I really do.”bigla nalang tumulo yung mga luha ko.
“I just want an average guy.. yung lalaking..yung..hinde naglalaro ng basketball.. yung.. hinde playboy.. yung hinde hinahabol ng mga babae… i just.. i just want.. to love and be loved.. Yun lang naman Dustin e..”She was still crying when she said those words.
“No, Dustin. You can’t. You just can’t give it up. You have to give up – me.”
“Ayoko..”
“Kung ayaw mo, I will. I give up! Ayoko na.. ayoko ng ganito..”
“Dahil si Xander parin ba? Ganun ba Ella? You just loved me kasi nakikita mo si Xander sakin. Diba?! naisip mo ba kung gano kasakit yun sa side ko? Kung ikaw minahal dahil sa isang deal, ako? Minahal lang dahil sa isang taong nagkaron ng amnesia at hinde maalala yung babaeng yun! Na nakikita niya lang yung taong yun sakin? At ngayon na bumalik, iiwan nalang ako?! ganun ba yun?”sobrang sakit ang nararamdaman ko.
“Dustin, gusto mo talagang malaman ang sagot ko sa tanong mo? Oo, at first, I saw Xander in you. Sa konting panahon, nakalimutan ko yung sakit dahil sa iyo. I was given hope again. Nalaman ko, na no matter how you close your heart, kahit lagyan mo pa ng kandado yung puso mo, bubukas at bubukas parin yan. Dun ko nalaman na I can still love again. Dun ko nalaman na pede rin pala akong maloko ulit.”
This is the first time that iniwan ako ng isang babaeng sobrang mahal ko sa lugar na to.
Now I know, this is the
most valuable place for me.
Ella’s POV
Umiiyak parin ako habang naglalakad sa ulan. Hinde ko parin matanggap that Dustin courted me because of a deal. Bakit ba ganito nalang lagi? Ako palage yung kawawa kapag naiinlove ako. Ako palagi yung inaapi.
**flashback
“alam mong mahal kita.”
“…”
“Ill go back at NY in no time. Ella, would you give me another chance and start again at the States?”
“Xander..”
“Alam ko, you’re with Dustin, but, do you really love him? If not, then just go with me..”
“Xander, Dustin is my boyfriend. I love him. Its just that.. im not really sure about it.”
“Ill give you time.. Can i get ur answer as soon as possible?”
“Yeah..” I
Then he kissed me on the cheeks. Siguro yun yung nakita nila. Pero that was just nothing.
**end
“Ella, si boyplen mo, nandito sa labas!”
“Sabihin mo hinde pa ako nakakauwi!”
Mahal ko nga ba si Dustin? Kung hinde, hindi naman ako iiyak ng ganito no? hinde ko na alam gagawin ko.
“Ella, kain na!”
“Opo.”
Nang bumaba ako, pakiramdam ko, tinutusok parin yung puso ko. Umupo ako sa table at yumuko habang hinihintay si Manang.
“Bakit? Nag-away ba kayo ni tisoy?”
Umiling lang ako kasi nga ayokong umimik. Baka mahalata niya sa boses ko.
“Kunwari ka pa.”
“Anong pinag-awayan niyo?”
“He made a deal.” I said in a small voice.
“Pwede pakitagalog lang ineng. Baka dumugo ang aking ilong niyan?”
“Pinaglaruan niya lang ako.”
“Anong klase? At bakit naman?”
“He just made a deal with me. Hinde niya naman talaga ako minahal e. Manang, ang sakit. Ang sakit sakit. Minsan na ngang nangyari sakin yan, tapoz mauulit ulit? Akala..akala ko..magbabago na ang lahat.. akala ko, si Dustin na talaga yung magmamahal sakin.. *hikbi*.. hinde pala.. nagkamali ako.. lahat sila..lahat sila.. manloloko..manloloko..”
“Taha na..Ang Diyos ay may plano sa inyong dalawa Ella.”
“Tama ka, may plano nga ang Diyos. Binuksan niya ang isipan at ang mata ko na lahat ng lalaki ay manloloko.”
“Ella.. wag kang ganyan. Hinde lahat ng tao ay manloloko. Sa tingin ko naman kay Dustin, hinde ka niya niloko. Mahal ka niya Ineng.”
“Sinungaling siya.. sinungaling siya..”sabi ko nalang habang umiiyak.
Dustin’s POV
“Ano, Ysa? Masaya ka na? Masaya na kayong dalawa dahil nalaman niya na? Masaya na ba kayo na malamang galit na galit siya sakin? Ano?! Wala na e.. tapos na e.. wala na..” sabi ko habang pinipigilan yung mga luha na umiipon sa mata ko.
“Dustin. I did for you. For the both of you..”she said habang umiiyak.
“Yeah, you did it for the both of us. And thank you. Thank you ha? Job well done. Great! Five stars for you.”
“Dustin.. your welcome.”
Sinuntok ko yung pader na nasa gilid ng kinatatayuan namin. Nabigla naman silang dalawa.
Tumakbo ako at kinuha yung bag ko sa school at lumabas. Dumiretso ako sa bahay nina Ella.
“Ella! Ella!! Pwede ba kitang makausap?”
Lumabas naman si Manang at sumigaw ng“Ella, boyplen mo nandito sa labas!”
“Sabihin mo hinde pa ako nakakauwi!”
And to think of, siya yung batang babae na binigyan ko ng bracelet. Waaaah! Kamalasan! Yan kasi, naniniwala sa quote na “Play while you’re waiting 4 the ryt one”.. but be careful who you play with? Coz baka yun nga yung hinihintay mo? Arrrgghh!
Napatingin ako sa bintana ng kwarto niya. I saw her closed the curtain. Tumalikod ako at dumiretso sa bahay. Wala na namang tao. Pumunta ako sa kitchen. Si Cheska, may pajama party daw sa bahay ng friend niya. Si Mommy, may business trip. Si Dad? Ewan ko dun. Baka uuwi din dito mamaya. Umupo ako dun sa entertainment room at nag-isip. Pinapatahan yung galit na nararamdaman ko sa loob.
Whew..
Then I heard na may kotseng tumigil. That must be Dad. Bumaba ako at nag greet ng ‘good evening’. Then umakyat again at dumiretso sa kwarto. Nag-order nalang siya ng pagkain sa labas at tinawag ako at kumain kami.
“Got any problem?”
“Wala po.”I said.
“Hinde ka naman ganyan pag magkasama tayo ah? Si Ella ba?”
“What happened?”
“Alam niya na pinagpustahan namin siya.. and.. well, yeah, masama yun. Pero dad, ginawa ko yung pustahan na yun para maging dahilan ko sa pangliligaw sa kanya na hinde pinagtatawanan ng mga kada ko, na hinde nanginginig yung mga tuhod ko kasi I can say to myself na, ‘remember, pustahan lang yan’.”
“In short, you used it to motivate you in courting her?”
“Yeah.”
“You don’t really wanna hurt her, do you?”
“Of course, I dont want to hurt her.”
“Dustin, remember this, you’ll know tha a girl loves you if she wouldn’t hurt you no matter how much you hurt her. And you’ll know how much you love her, if you don’t hurt her even if you know you can.”
“Dad..”
My Dad tapped my shoulder and smiled. Sometimes si Dad, bolero pag oras ng kagaguhan, pero si Daddy, maaasahan mo talaga yan pag kelangan mo ng kausap.
“Thanks.”
Pero ewan ko ba, tumayo ako at pumunta ng kwarto, kinuha ko ang bola na naroon sa cabinet at pumunta ng basketball court. Hinde naman ganun kadelikado kasi marami-rami pa yung tao na nandun since yung b-ball court e nandun sa park ng village.
Parang hinila nalang ako ng mga paa ko dun. Then I played basketball. Mag-isa lang ako dun sa court na nagdidribble. Mukha na akong lelang pero pakiramdam ko, eto lang yung way na mejo magpapagaan ng pakiramdam ko.
Nang lumingon ako, nakita ko si Ella na nakatayo dun sa dulo ng b-ball court. Bigla nalang akong napatigil. Nakatingin lang kami sa isa’t-isa.
“Ella..”
“Ella, sandali.”Hinawakan ko yung kanang braso niya at niyakap siya.“Pakinggan mo muna ako. please…”
“Ayoko na..”she said.
“Ella, mahal kita.. please, another chance.. another chance..”I
“Dustin, I don’t need guys like you. Sabi mo, Ive changed you. Pero, did i really change you?”
“Ella, you did. Youre.. you’re just afraid to take the risk in continuing changing me.”
“I want an average guy. At yun yung hinde mo magagawa para sakin. Alam mo kung bakit? Kasi nga, you’re not an average guy. Isa ka sa mga taong mahirap abutin. Paglalaruan mo lang yung mga taong nasa ibaba mo. And sad to say, kasali ako sa mga laruan mo
“Ella..”
“I don’t need you. I don’t need another man who will break my heart into pieces over and over again. You’re just another liar na dapat kinaiinisan at hinde pinaniniwalaan. I pity the girl na magmamahal sa iyo.”
Clap. Clap. Clap.
“What a nice scene.”
Lumingon ako para tingnan kung sino yun. Naalarma ako ng makita ko si Jake na nakatayo dun kasama ang barkada niya. Pinaatras ko si Ella sa likod ko.
“Wag muna dito Jake.”
“Mas okay nga dito e. Sabi mo noon, wag rin muna. Siguro eto na yung tamang panahon diba?”
“May kasama akong babae. respeto lang kahit ngayong gabi lang.”
“Bitiwan niyo ako!! Ano ba?! Bitiwan niyo ako!”
“Ella?!”
“Ngayon lang kitang nakitang natakot Lizares! Importante ba talaga tong babaeng to?”
“Don’t touch her!”
“Konting galaw mo lang, at hinde mo magugustuhan ang mangyayari dito sa pretty girl mo.”
“Fine.”
Tinaas ko ang kamay ko. Then nakita kong sumenyas si Jake sa mga kasama niya.
Bogsh! Bogsh! Pak! Pak!
“Dustin!! Dustin, lumaban ka! Ano kaba?!”
Bogsh! Bogsh! Pak! Pak!
“Dustin! Dustin..”
Behind my blurry vision, I can see Ella standing habang hinahawakan ng dalawang lalaki.
Hinang-hina na yung katawan ko. Ni hinde na ako makatayo ng maayos. Hinde ko alam kung san yung sumasakit. Sa mukha ba o sa katawan ko. Halo-halo na. Takot, galit, konsensya, sakit. Lahat.
“Pare, tama na yan! Baka mapatay natin!”
Im standing on one knee. Hinde na kaya ng katawan ko. Behind the red blurry vision, nakita kong binitiwan nila si Ella at tumakbo sila palayo. Ella came rushing into me.
“Dustin.. sandali..wait, hang on! Tatawag..*hikbi*..tatawag ako ng.. ambulansya..tama, ambulansiya..”
“I..just..i just..want..you to know.. Ella..”
“Wag muna.. sandali..”
“Dustin..”umiiyak na siya.
“Just let me finish..”
“I love you..”
Ella’s POV
Hinde ko alam kung pano at kelan kami nakarating sa ospital. Pero ang natatandaan ko lang, duguan si Dustin nang makarating kami sa emergency room. Sa sobrang takot ko, ni hinde na ako makapagsalita kung anong nangyari. Then the nurses gave me some water to drink. Tumahan naman ako at naibigay ko yung phone number nila sa bahay.
“Iha, just sit there and wait for the parents of your friend ha?”
After 30 minutes or so, dumating yung Daddy ni Dustin.
“What happened?”
“Mr. Lizares.. good evening po..”
“Iha, anong nangyari?”
“Si..si Dustin po.. nabugbog.” sabi ko habang umiiyak.
“I told him not to engage in those fights!”He said.“BAkit siya napaaway?”
“I think..i think, may nangyari na sakanila noon.. and.. the guy’s just taking a revenge to him..”
“Then? Hinde ba siya lumaban?”
“Kin-..they used me against him..”
“Oh God..”huminga ng malalim yung Daddy niya at nilagay ang kamay nito sa noo at pumikit.“Ano name ng bumugbog sakanya?”
“There were 6 of them. Yung dalawa nakahawak sakin. Yung leader nanonood. I heard Dustin said ‘Jake’.”
“Jake? Jake Madrigal?”
“Im not really sure.. Kanina ko lang po nakita yung lalaking yun.”
“Dad, what happened?!”
“Dustin’s in there.”
“Is he alright? Dad? What?”
“I don’t know. They’re checking up on him.”
Umupo si Cheska sa tabi ko.
“What are you doing here?”
“……”
“She was with Dustin ng nabugbog ang kuya mo.”
“I thought so too. Siya lang naman ang nagbibigay ng sakit ng ulo kay Kuya e.”
I looked at her na parang nashock ako sa sinabi niya.
“Cheska!” Her Dad warned her. “Don’t say things like that again.”
“Im sorry.”
“Huh..sorry.? Ano pang magagawa ng sorry mo? My brother’s in there!”turo niya sa ER.“If something happens to him, I won’t forgive you..”
“Im sorry.. im really sorry..”
We waited like 30 minutes or so. His mom arrived just in time.
“Ano na? Dad? Ano na? How’s my son?”
“Wala pang result.”
“Mommy..
“Its alright, honey. Walang mangyayaring masama sa kuya mo.”
Then napansin niya akong nakaupo dun sa bench.
“Ella?”
“Po?”
“In behalf of my son, Im sorry. Im really sorry. He really loves you so much that’s why he did that. I just hope you understand everything. Im really sorry that it has to get to this point. He hurt you. You hurt him. Let’s just be, good to each other. Okay?”
I just nodded.
Then finally, the door at the ER opened. The doctor went out.
“Ano na?”
“We’re the parents.”
“Im sorry to say that.. besides of having a bone fracture at the arms, an internal bleeding near the head.. and a black eye at the eye..
…your son’s okay.”
———-
And yeah, we’re friends already. Forgetting is a hard job, but to forgive is not. They apologized to me. Si Xander naman he went to the States already. I told him that what we had before couldn’t be restored anymore. And he accepted it gladly.
Hinde ko alam kung makakagraduate si Dustin. But I heard, may teacher na dumadalaw sa kanya doon at tinuturuan siya sa mga lessons. Then, binibigyan siya ng quizzes. Exams? Doon na rin sa hospital. Binabantayan lang siya ng teacher.
Ewan ko ba at parang natatakot akong magpakita sa kanya doon sa hospital. Hinde ko alam kung bakit nasasaktan ako pag naririnig ko yung mga kwento ng mga schoolmates ko about sa kanya. Pakiramdam ko, ako ang may kasalanan ng lahat. But not until that day.
“Yeah?..no way!.. im not going back! Im staying here Mom. NY university?! No way! Philippines is-..yeah..okay..bye..”
“I really think you should visit him.”
“Huh?”
“Dustin.. I think you should visit him.”
“Ella, please.. for me?”
“Okay..”
Pagkatapos ng practice, dumiretso ako sa hospital. Hinde ko alam kung pano at ano ang sasabihin ko sakanya. Nininerbyos ako sa pwede kong masabi sa kanya. I hurt him once, twice is too much.
Before I went up to the stairs, huminga ako ng malalim. Nang papasok na ako sa room niya, lumabas naman si Cheska. She looked at me na parang nagtataka kung bakit ngayon lang ulit ako nagpakita. I just looked at her. Then, binuksan niya yung door for me.
“He’s asleep.”
“Okay lang.”
Sinirado niya naman ito at lumabas. Lumapit ako sa kama ni Dustin. Nakahiga lang siya habang nakasemento yung braso niya. Hinde ako makapagsalita. Pero siguro mas maayos na tong tulog siya. At least, I can really say to him kung ano talaga niloloob nito.
I sat down beside his bed dun sa stool. Then I looked at him and held his hands.
“Dustin..”I said habang pinipigilan ko yung luha na lumabas sa mata ko.“Im really sorry. Tama, yun yung unang dapat kong sabihin sa iyo. Im sorry. Hinde ko alam kung bakit ako pumunta rito. Siguro kasi i kept my promise to Ysa? Pero hinde eh. Ive got lots of things to say to you. Marami. Sobrang dami, hinde ko alam kung san magsisimula.” Tears flowed from my eyes. “Sabi mo, mahal mo ako. But Dustin, I need an average guy. Yung katulad ko. Hinde ko alam kung maniniwala ako sa iyo, o hinde. But Im sure of one thing. You made me feel – special. You really made me feel – loved.” I wiped the tears in my eyes. “
…I loved and I was loved…”
I wiped my tears and started to walk papunta ng pintuan. Kelangan kong maging matatag. Dahil kung hindi, Ill find myself hurt again. Ng lumabas ako. I saw Cheska standing sa gilid ng wall. I looked at her.
“Ches..”
Before I could say any word, she hugged me and started to cry.
“Im sorry. Im sorry Ate Ella..” She said.
“Its alright. Ill go ahead. Wag mong pababayaan kuya mo ha?”
She nodded. I hugged her again and went ahead. Ni hindi ko napigilan ang pagdaloy ng mga luha ko sa mata. Sobrang sakit na malaman na i just have to leave everything in destiny. As I walk down the alley, hinde ko maiwasang maisip ang lahat ng pinagdaanan namin ni Dustin. Even though, it wasn’t that much, but at least, we tried our best to hold on. Its just that, Im afraid to take the risk. He’s right. I’m just afraid to take the risk in contiuing changing him. Takot ako. Duwag ako e. Duwag.
Cheska’s POV
I know naintindihan ni Ate Ella yung pagyakap ko sa kanya kanina. Nandun na yung lahat ng bagay na gustong sabihin. Alam kong sobrang sakit yung nararamdaman niya when she bade goodbye to my bro. I even saw my brother’s tears fell when she kissed him on the forehead. Hinde ko lang maintindihan kung bakit hindi niya pinigilan si Ella sa pag-alis. I went inside and sat down beside him.
“She was here.”
He faced the opositte direction. I know that he doesn’t want me to see him crying. He doesn’t want me to know that he’s weak. He doesn’t want me to see the pain that he’s feeling.
“I don’t understand bakit di ka man lang tumayo diyan at pinigilan siya.”
“This is what we call self-sacrificing love.” he said. “You’ll never understand this hangga’t hindi mo to mararanasan, Ches.”
“Pero Kuya, you love each other.. ano pa bang kulang?”
“I do love her. And Im willing to give up everything I got for her. But then, love isn’t self centered. Hindi lang ako yung involve dito. Sa aminin ko man at sa hindi, takot siya. Takot siyang masaktan ulit. She’s afraid to take risks. Kahit gusto kong iassure sa kanya na I won’t hurt her, hindi ko makukuha yung takot na yun. Hindi.”
“Kuya..”
Dustin’s POV
Am I stu-pid or what? She went here to tell those things to me. Pero hindi ko siya pinigilan sa pag-alis niya. Alam kong alam niya na hindi ako tulog. Alam kong she saw the tears na pumatak sa mga mata ko when she kissed me. Hindi ko rin alam kung bakit hindi ako tumayo at pinigilan siya. Siguro kasi, I really want to test destiny. I want to know kung pumapayag talaga yung fate saming dalawa.
We’ll just see, kahit na masakit, I have to accept that she’s temporarily away from me.
Ni hindi ko na siya nakitang umalis. One week na yung nakaraan since she last visited me. Pagkatapos ng graduation, pinalabas na ako ng hospital. Yup, high school’s over. Fun’s over at kelangan ng magseryoso this time in college. I took up Computer Engineering. Wala akong planong mag engineer pero ewan ko ba at ito ang kinuha ko. Sabi nila kakaloka din daw yung Math dito. Trigo pa nga lang di ko na kaya, eto pa kaya? But that was before. I just learned na matalino din pala ako sa Math, hindi lang ako nag-aaral ng mabuti. Thanks to her.
Classes started and Im on. Lumabas ako ng bahay. Napatigil ako when I saw a car na lumabas sa bahay nina Ella noon. Yeah, she went to the States already. Ayoko nang sisihin ang sarili ko kung bakit di ko siya pinigilan. Sawa na ako sa kakasisi. I stopped and looked at the house. Hindi parin ganun kadaling mawala sa isip ko ang lahat. I still hope. I really do.
I just smiled at nagsimulang maglakad. First day sa Xavier University. I was planning to continue my college life sa St. Peter’s. Pero ayoko na, many things had happned in there. Masyadong masakit kung araw-araw kong nakikita yun.
“Pare!”
Yeah, iisang school kami. Wala lang. Trip lang eh.
“Uy, Les! Musta na?”
“Ayos lang. Di ka masyadong sumasama samin sa gigs ah.”
“Wala lang.”I said.
“Nga pala, may try out mamaya sa Basketball Team nila dito. Punta ka ha?”
I looked at him. I smiled. “Hindi na.”
“Hm? Bakit?”
I know nabigla siya and i know i left a big question mark on his brain. Pagod na rin akong mag explain kung bakit ayoko nang maglaro ng basketball. Since she was gone, nawalan na ako ng ganang maglaro ng basketball. And minsan, sumasakit yung kamay ko sa sobrang pagdidribble. Remember the bone fracture at my right arm? Yeah, its healed, pero minsan, sinusumpong talaga.
“Hey, yan ba si # 10 of Horses?”
Dumiretso lang ako sa paglakad as if na hindi ako yung tinutukoy nila.
“Hey!! Dustin?! Papicture naman o
Nabigla ako. Hindi ko alam kung anong gagawin ko. I just smiled at her and said,
“Pero diba ikaw yung MVP of the year? Tapos team captain ka pa ng basketball, and we heard hearthrob ka daw? Sige na, papicture.”
“Im sorry, hindi talaga pwede. And yung mga sinabi niyo, hindi na ako yun. That was me before now. Right now,
…Im just an average guy. Not a team captain, not an MVP and not a hearthrob. Just a guy.”
4 years had gone na wala akong narinig sa kanya. Hindi ko alam kung kailangan ko pang umasa. Sabi ni Mommy, i have to let go. I graduated from college and worked at a big company. Business partner ni Daddy yung napasukan ko. So, all praises to me parin. Kumuha ako ng board exam and was on the top ten. Glad i made it.
Ysa’s on Hongkong. She made a deal with a fashion company. Bianca? I really don’t know where she is. But then I heard she’s at Singapore doing some modeling.
It was an early morning. I went to the office very early kasi nga marami pa akong tatapusin.
“Good morning Mr. Lizares.”
“Good morning. Hmm, any sched?” I
“Hmm, let me see. You’ve got a meeting with Mr. Ayala at 11 am. A conference with Mr. Guttierez at 2 pm. That’s all.”
“Thank you.”
“Hmm, sir? May letter ka po diyan. Dumating kanina lang. Its in your table.”
I looked at the envelope. I was shocked to find out that it came from St. Peter’s University.
Pupunta ba ako? O hindi? I asked myself over and over again. Then I decided that i’ll go nalang. Wala namang mawawala e. Diba? So let’s just see and find out.
That’s 1 week away from this week. And sa sobrang busy ko, hindi ko na namalayan na alumni homecoming na ng school. I called Hans kung pupunta siya, he said yes. He’ll bring his wife daw. Yeah, he’s married already. Buti nga di nambababae e.
“Hmm, sir, may meeting po kayo with Mr. Garriel at 9 pm sa Convention Hotel.”
“Hmm, Tessa? Can someone fill it up for me? May pupuntahan pa kasi ako e. Im really sorry.”
“Sure sir.”
Lumabas naman ako ng office at nagdrive papuntang Grand’s avenue. Malayo-layo ng konti yung pinagtatrabahuan ko sa school. Ni hindi na nga ako nakapagbihis. Pero ayos lang, di naman ako nagpainit or nagpawis e.
I parked my car outside. Late na kasi akong dumating. 8 nagstart yung cocktail party, 9:30 na ako dumating. The traffic man! damn! Nahihiya nga akong pumasok e. Pero bakit pa? Kung san ako tumanda, dun pa ako nahiya.
Bago ako pumasok, i just felt everything came back. Lahat nang nangyari sakin sa highschool. The fun, the kagaguhan, lahat. Pakiramdam ko, Im a teen ager again. Pero hindi e, Im over with that. Really over with that.
Pumasok ako ng auditorium. Marami na rin palang pinagbago ang school. Nakita ko naman kaagad sina Hans, Lester and John. Hans’ with his wife. Si Lester, single parin. Si John naman engaged na. Couldn’t see Bianca. Pero nandun narin si Ysa. I walked near them then Ysa kissed me on the cheeks. Nagtawanan naman kami nina Hans.
“Pare! Its like highschool again no?”
“Dun kami nagpakasal sa states e. I met her kasi dun. Oh yeah, Jean, my friend, Dustin. Dustin, wife ko, si Jean.”
“Looking and waiting for her?”
I smiled.“Hindi ah. See this?”tinaas ko yung kamay ko para makita niya.
“Hay naku. Alam ko noh!”
“Wait, labas muna ako Ysa. Ive got some place to check in to. Nga pala, tapos na ba yung basketball tournament ng highschoolers dito?”
“Yeah, natapos mga past 7.”
“Ahh, sige. Ill be back in a minute.”
I walked slowly at the corridors. Then dumaan ako sa locker.
“Dito ko sinabit yung bracelet noon.”
Dumaan naman ako sa may tubo dun malapit sa canteen.
“Dito siya umiyak dahil hinulog nina Bianca yung bracelets niya.”
“Dito siya unang nasaktan because of me. Dito rin siya huling nasaktan.”
Pumasok ako at ngumiti. Huminga ako ng malalim at tumayo sa gitna ng court. Kumuha ako ng bola sa gilid at nagdribble. Then nagtry ng lay up. Too bad, hindi na shoot. Then I shaked my hands. I tried again pero hindi parin nashoot. Naiinis na ako so I tried a free throw. Hindi parin na shoot. Hanggang tumigil na ako sa pagshoshoot. Umupo ako dun sa gitna ng court habang nasa gilid ko yung bola.
“Dun siya nagshoshoot ng bola.”I pointed out.“Tapos dun ko din naiwan yung trig notebook ko. Dun kami nagkaroon ng deal.” Turo ko sa bench. “Diyan ako nakatayo when I first saw her. Doon naman natapos ang lahat.”
Tumayo ulit ako at sinubukan kong magshoot ng bola. Bakit hindi ko kaya mashoot ito ng tama? Then bigla nalang may nagshoot ng bola sa likod ko. Nabigla ako at napalingon.
To my surprise, there she is, standing right before me.
“Don’t tell me, tumanda ka lang di ka na makapagshoot ng maayos?”
Para akong lelang na nakatayo lang dun sa harapan niya. I couldn’t find my voice. Pakiramdam ko, everything’s so dark at siya lang yung nakikita ko.
“Dustin?”
“Im sorry.”I said nang bumalik ako sa Earth galing Pluto.
“I didn’t expect that I’ll find you here.”she said smiling.
“Yeah.”I smiled.“Galing mo nang magbasketball a.”
“Hindi naman gaano. Ikaw nga e, national player ka na siguro, then di ka pa makashoot ng 2 points.”
“Still the same? Team captain?”
Napaupo na lang ako sa sahig without ven answering her question.
She sat down beside me naman. I know we’ve got lots of things to talk to.
“How’s life at the States?”I asked.
“Fine. I graduated from my course, business administration.”
“That’s great. Me too, Ive graduated from electronics computer engineering. Just finished getting a board exam. Top ten.”I said smiling.
“Wow. Pero diba you’re not that good in Math?”
“Thanks to you. Ive been very good in Math.”
She laughed.“So, involved?”
“You mean, with someone?”
“Yeah.. you know.. hindi naman pwedeng wala kang gf no? I mean, with that face of yours?”
“Well.. honestly, tagtatatatlo nga eh.”
“Seriously?!”
“Just kidding.”
Then she did the same. Nabigla nalang ako when I looked at her, her face’s in shock.
“Y-you’re.. you’re engaged?”
“Well..”Nagdadalawang isip ako kung sasabihin ko ba.“Yeah. Im engaged.” I
“I thought so too.”
Tumahimik kaming dalawa. Then I started speaking.
“Remember the day when you told me, you just want an average guy? I gave up basketball when I entered college. Sinubsob ko yung sarili ko sa pag-aaral. Siguro nga sa 4 years na yun, twice lang ako pumunta ng bar. Im not a hearthrob anymore. Hindi narin ako team captain. I gave that up all because a girl told me that she just wants an average guy.”
“You didn’t. You’re kidding me.”she said.
“Im not. Kaya siguro I don’t even know how to play basketball right now. Bago ka umalis, I heard everything you said to me.”
“Bakit.. bakit di mo ako pinigilan?!”
“You told me to believe in fate. To have faith in fate. And i did. I’ve waited for you, pero kahit ni minsan di ka nagparamdam, i thought our chapter has finally ended. And alam ko, kahit I assured you that i’ll never hurt you, kahit na pinigilan kita, do you think, magpapapigil ka ba? I think not. You’re the kind of girl na pag sinabi mong ganyan, ganyan talaga. You’re weak, even though you try to hide it. Nakikita ko yun Ella. You were afraid to take risks. You were afraid to continue changing me. Takot kang masaktan kaya you chose to leave everything behind.” Pinipigil ko na talaga yung luha sa mata kong lumabas. “And then, she came. She was a lot like you. The only difference was she wasn’t afraid to take risks. Hindi siya natakot masaktan. She knew all about our past. She was like my bestfriend. She wasn’t afraid to get hurt. And she continued to change me na hindi mo ginawa. Ive longed for you. Pero she filled me up. And I know I didn’t love her because I see you in her, I love her because she loves me. As you said, she loved, and she was loved.”
“Im sorry.”
She cried very hard. I know wala akong magagawa, but then, i offered her a hug. She cried at my chest. Kahit ako nasasaktan. Pero everything’s different now. What we had before, couldn’t be restored anymore. Everything’s not the same as before. I did my best here, pero tinakbuhan niya ako. No, hindi ako, she ran away from love, from my love.
She just cried and cried.
“Im so happy for you..”
I know that was a lie. I know in no time, she’ll be okay. I know she will.
I just hugged her again. This time, it was tighter. This’ll be my last hug to her. Maybe.
Then I heard a voice. “Dustin?”
“Dustin?”
“Cara..”then she went up to us. “Oh, Cara, this is Ella, and Ella? This is my fiance, Cara.”
“Nice meeting you..” Ella said.
“Dustin told me a lot of things about you. Its so great to finally meet you.”
Cara saw her crying and she looked at me. I just smiled at her. Then she excused herself.
“I think i’ll just go back to the hall. Ill see you guys later.”
Tears at her eyes started to fall again.
“She’s a great girl.”
“I know.”I said smiling.
“So maybe, this is when the time that we finally close our chapter huh?”
“……”
I kissed her on the cheek.
“I’ll be going.” I said.“You sure, you’ll be okay?”
“I will..”she said softly.
“Okay..”
Mtagal ko nang tinanggap that we’re not meant for each other. That was since I started falling in love with Cara. And she just have to accept the fact that we’re over.
Our chapter has permanently ended.
********
I went here para makita siya muli. Bumalik ako para sabihin sa kanya that I’m ready to take another chance. I want to know if he’s still in love with me or something.
But then, I found out that he’s engaged. I felt my heart broke into pieces. I felt my hopes shattered. The man i thought i’d spend my life with is getting married. I’m so !@#$ holding to the glimmer of hope that there’s still a chance for the both of us. When I saw the ring in his finger, pakiramdam ko hindi ako makahinga. I felt there’s a big lump in my throat that i couldn’t find words to say. Then naramdaman ko na lang the warm liquids flowing from eyes unto my cheeks. And before I knew it, he wrapped me in his arms. Why? Because he knows that he hurt me. Alam niyang sobra akong nasasaktan. Sa sobrang sakit na yun, wala na akong nasabi. I just cried and cried and cried. Hindi ko nagawang magalit kasi I don’t have any right to do so. I was the one who left him.
I was the one who got afraid of taking risks. I was the one who made this complicated. In my blurry vision, I saw him walking palabas ng court. My tears were streaming down. I felt my knees went weak. The man im wishing and loving for all of my life, is finally walking out from my life. When he was nowhere of my sight, i walked outside. I looked at the sky. Its dark and cloudy. As i was walking down the aisle, rain started to fall. I opened my hands to feel it.
I know Im gonna be okay. I know Im gonna be okay, in no time.
You see, Im not the guy for her. I know God has someone prepared for her.
Its not just me. I know they’ll find each other in each other’s arms someday. I just wish when that time comes, we’re all better persons.
So this is when I say goodbye to you.
This book will be closed.
My life’s chapter didn’t end here. But ‘our’ love story did.
The End
nice 🙂
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the best… but very sad ending…T-T i cried,, a lot…
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sooooo saaaaaaaddd!!! i really love this!!! but whyyy??? bakeeet nanyari to????? soooo saaaad!!!
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kewl
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bat ganun? ilang ulit ko na tong binasa (nung nasa multiply mo pa to) …naiiyak parin ako?
bat kasi ang sad ng storii eh. huhuhu.
gusto ko talagang SILA parin in the end. andami na kasing nangyari eh tapos…ganun nalang? huhu.
sino ba naman kasi yang Carang yan eh! pwedeng ipapatay sya? eepal-epal kasi! lol.
sana may season 2 pa to. naks. yung mamatay si Cara. tapos happy ending na. LOL.
hayy..galing mo talaga ate kim..pinapaiyak mo talaga ako. :((
more stories pa po!..
update mo na rin ang fall for you. :]
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ansaket amn ng ending. pero nice ganda amn.
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aw nmn ung ending 😦
nice story ^^
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ang ganda:))
haha:]]
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ow?
ouchness naman.
kawawa ci ella:((
haha.
well done:)
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sayang naman. ..
bat ganun nanyare. .
ok nasana. .
pero bat d parin appie ending. . ??
pero owkie lang yun.. .
ganda naman ei..
🙂
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grabeee…
sarap tlga ulet uletin…
haii..
naubos nanaman mga panyo ko kakaiyak sa storing ito..
grabee..
ur the best tlga..
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hayzz.. di nagkatuluyan si ate ella
at kuya dustin.. wawa xa
cnunod na nga ung pgiging
AVERAGE man nEa aHy..
bUhAy tAlAgA pArAng lIfE…
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WAAH.. sad aco, d cla ang
ngkatuluyan.. waah, naiiyak
aco, kxe d cla ang ngkatuluyan,
naniwla c dustin sa fate.. kaso,
d tlguh cla ang meant to be..
aixxt.. panuh ba un? iyak na
iyak na guh aco.. huhuhu
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pareho tayo…
ah…
i hate crying…
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“the sequel”… very nice!
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fairytales don’t always have a hppay ending.. :[ soo sad.. but nice one sis.. you made me cry again.. :]]
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waa.
bketx gnun ?
ansad ng ending ! ]]x
peu gnda ng stury ..
nyahaha .. :))
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WOW. Kakaiyak! =( Love it!
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ganda ng mga story mo ate kimmie.. :]]
haay, ang sad ng ending nito..
kakaiyak..
ang bigat ng feeling ng heart ko..
hohoho.. 🙂
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ate kim!!!!!! ang saket……hheehhe
umiyak effct ako !!!!!!!!!!
grabeh……galeng moh…!!!!!!!!
luv yer stories……sana akin nalang si papa dustin…..
hahaha…..
ganda grabeh………luv yer stories!!!!!!
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helloo..
NICE tlga.. mejo shocking lang ung ending, sad ksi hindi sila per0 UMIYAK tlga ak0 ng bonggang-bonnga.. how I wish n sana maayos n si Ella kung tototo man to.. hehe.
this story would probably the most “TOUCHING” internet love stoey i’ve ever read.. Tahnk You for making this.. haha, i almost bawled.. hehe, just kidding..
:p
=h0ney
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huhuhuh
sad po tlaga story
sabi nga ng kasabihan
True Love Doesnt Have A Happy Ever After,
Because True Love Is Not A Fantasy
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i
really love it
ang sad ng ending
i thought they
were meant to be!!!!!
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nice! napaiyak ako. (:
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darn it! ang sad ng ending! :((
pero nice ng story. i really hate sad endings!.
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nice reading your story
dis story made me cry T.T
hahaha sana gnwa mo nlng happy ending
xD
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aww men! . sad ending .
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This story of yours made me cry. Aww. This is great! Really. Two Thumbs Up!* Hope you have more inspiring stories. Thanks for sharing your knowledge ate. 😀
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Thumbs UP!*
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i love the story
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ganda! 🙂
napaiyak ako T_T
sayang naman silang dalawa ..
love itt ! 😀
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gnda ng sturii
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sna may sequel tlaga.. ung about sa nangyari naman ke ella…
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hindi bah tlga pwd nah xeh ella nalang at xeh dustin.yung magkatuluyan?..wawa naman xeh ella…hahaizt….kung xan kaxe malapit nah yung ending chaka pah lumabaz xeh cara..hmmm..pero nyc parin ung story…yun nga lang sad ending…huhuhu…
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what happend?? kala ko pa namn na magiging happy ending ang lahat.. but for some reason may nasaktan pa din……
hayy.. dapat sana nagkatulayan na lang c ella at c dustin that a better ending than finding someone…
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ganda naman . T.T
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naiiyak ako 😦 ..
pro dbest.
kj ni cara. grrr. 😛
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natouch talaga ako…
i can’t help but to cry…
pwede bang gawan ng another version ang ending nito…??
yung sila dustin at ella naman ang magkakatuluyan…
super super sad talaga…
…pero siguro ganyan talaga…
marami akong lessons na nakuha dito…
…dapat huwag matakot magtake ng risk…
kasi kung di mo susubukan baka mas marami pang bagay na mas mahalaga sayo ang mawala…
malaki yung pinakawalan ni ella eh…
pero i love her character…
sana nga makaget over na siya…
and find the right man for her…
kahit fiction lang to…
kudos sayo author!
your great…
Sana kung may sequel pa po yung story na to…
sana yung story po ay about sa magiging anak ni Dustin and ni Cara..at yung anak ni Ella with his new love…
sana magawan niyo po ng story yung magiging anak nila…
para kahit yung mga anak man lang nila ang magkatuluyan…
hehe sensya na po…
umaandar ang imagination ko ng dahil dito! hehe
GOD BLESS!!ATE KIM :)))
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Haha, MVP’s ending is supposed to be just like this… to always remind you guys that if you think you found the right one, never let go because when you do, who knows, someone might grab him/her as fast as you loved him. 🙂
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wow..nice advice ate kimmie :))
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SANA MAGAWAN PO ITO NG SEQUEL…
kung saan ang magiging anak ni Dustin at ni Ella ang magkakatuluyan…kahit yung mga anak man lang nila ang magkatulyan happy na ako……
sana..sana…sana..
sorry po!hehe
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nakakainis aa ..
kala ko ba naniniwala ka sa “faith in fate” ?
bat ganyan ung kinalabasan nio ..
kawawa nman si ella ..
ready na siya pra sa another chance na hinihingi mo tapos ganun ungkinalabasan nio ?
hayy naku ur so mean !!!
ur not good for ella !
++ hahaha .. pasensya over-acting .. masyado kong dinamdam ang story .. bka magkaroon na ako ng sakit sa puso nito .. ++
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Haha, natuwa naman ako sa iyo 😀
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hala..umiyak ako dito.grbe :(((((((.kala ko HAPPY yung ending yung pala sad :(((((((((( .bat ganun.kala ko sila magkakatuluyan.huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu =((((((
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Great story. The essence of life, love, faith, and destiny altogether. :”>
Idol 😉
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Yes, exactly! 🙂 Thank you.
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Ate kim Please! Make “MVP: An Alternate Ending.” Please Oh Please! Gusto ko sana Magka-tuluyan sila Ella and Dustin eh :)) Maganda ang Ending, it just didn’t end the way I wanted it 😀 Anyways you make,GREAT no, Scratch that. AWESOME STORIES! Please continue making them. Lalo na yung mga Nakakatawa ang Nakaka-Kilig Vibes just like this one :DD Keep up the good work po! You’re an Inspiration to me po :))
BTW. Nakakatawa talaga si Manang Hilda! XD
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Hahaha, I can’t. 🙂 That’s the very essence of the story. You shouldn’t be afraid to jump right in and let love enter when its knocking.. kasi you’ll never know what will happen in the future. Yung like, akala mo, kayo na talaga kasi handa ka na, yun pala, handa na rin syang maghanap ng iba.. yung ganun. :)) All of my stories has happy endings naman.. ito lang yung medyo iba. Hahaha. Let’s keep it that way. 🙂 Thank you!
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100% cute
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the what?
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oh..last night i cried because of this story 😀 oh.. the fall for you is a very nice story too!can you make a story that is a happy ending? ! xD weehh.. i like the teaser too.how cute.he’s been teasing the girl so that he can even be close to her.and in that way his knees will not trembles xD more power Ate Kim !!XD
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oh i love this story! dustin was pretty charming although he’s a cassanova .. how sad they’re not rily meant for each other. TWO THUMBS UP!!! xo excellent oh how i wish that dustin rily exist ahihihi assuming tlaga acu eheh guapo2 kce magdescribe ng author ee. na e.envisage cu tlaga ang features ng mukha nia
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Its so sad.
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